Closer to home than you might think
Because I often go onto Saddleworth.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:50, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Oooh.
Is there a prize if you find the last piece?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:52, Reply)

I hope so
It might be too late to train the boys to find rotten corpses though.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:54, Reply)

The only way to get them in the mood is to start slaying folk.
Give it a go. What's the worse than can happen?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:55, Reply)

I think mass murder is one of those things you feel a vocation for
I'm a bit too old to change paths now.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)

Maybe.
But you've only been self employed for a bit, and whilst that didn't start as well as you hoped, things have picked up.

Maybe genocide is your true calling.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:59, Reply)

Pol Pot didn't embark on Genocide until later life.
You could be right.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)

Well, but it on your kitchen calendar for September.
It might still be dry.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:08, Reply)

Eh?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)

Ah.
So you go out there to *bury* the bodies?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:53, Reply)

I know a better place
Dozer's garden.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:55, Reply)

+ lady

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:56, Reply)

On second thoughts
It's 30 miles from my house to Dozer's and the rotting corpse smell would linger in the car.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)

I've heard he's very handsome.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)

He could stare at your tits and it would be a compliment.
Assuming stories of his height are true.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)

I'm used to people staring at my tits.
They have their own postcode.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)

Your tits have their own postcode?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)

They're rather large.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)

Not for me then
I prefer the smaller breasted lady.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)

Damn.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)

Don't worry
I'm emphatically not a prime specimin of homo sapiens.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:18, Reply)

Well
Not sapiens, anyway.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:19, Reply)

You calling me a puff?
I might as well be - I'm heading for Cavy style desperation.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)

Ooh err missus.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)

Like the man out of Maroon 5

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)