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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I ordered a bottle of prosecco for Mrs V the other day, and one glass, as her mates hadn't arrived yet.
The young barman asked "So - what are you celebrating?" indicating the bottle.

"Er ... that it's ... nearly Friday ... ?" I asked.

I think he took that as manly and cool and that he shouldn't ask such questions again, because I then leapt over the bar, grabbed him by the throat and screamed "DON'T FUCKING ASK ME QUESTIONS, BOY!" into his face before beating him to death with a pint glass.

True story.
(, Thu 10 Oct 2013, 16:03, 1 reply, 11 years ago)
could you not afford champagne?

(, Thu 10 Oct 2013, 16:04, Reply)
The holes we drink in you have to blend in with the proles.
Holes, proles, and life goals - that's what me and Mrs V are all about.
(, Thu 10 Oct 2013, 16:07, Reply)

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