Wasps
I'm terrified, proper panick attack run away and hide afraid. But my office gets affy hot and my workchums don't really like the idea of being sealed in to save me from their evil plots.
Anyone got a natural repellant, SFW that I could have, say at my desk?
Failing that, don't suppose anyone is willing to come over and stand by my desk all day and shoo them away (theres a nest of some sort outside, and I'm the poor bugger sitting at the window!)
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 13:56, 19 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I was just about to post something about this
having spent the last 7 minutes running about squealing because one of the little beasts found its way into my office and then decided its favourite place was IN MY FACE!

aaaargh!

so yes, I feel your pain, but no, I'm not going to help you.

a rolled up newspaper maybe?

or failing that, a can of hairspray and a match?
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 13:59, Reply)

had wasp issues while camping before
what you need is a wasp trap.

I recommend something like a not completely empty muller fruit corner, or something equally sweet.

stick it outside your window and the wasps will go to that rather than bother you
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:00, Reply)

eek!
I can't do the newspaper /spray can thing cos i'm too afraid to get that close, but i may try the honey trap thing !
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:03, Reply)

Tulip!
I'm shocked! Hairspray and a match?

Poor wasps.
( thealternativefact, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:07, Reply)

^Vipros has a good plan
I tend to use jam jars with a bit of jam at the very bottom as it's too sticky for them to get out of and the steep slippery sides are too much for them *evil laughter*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:07, Reply)

the honey trap is a brilliant idea
Would the world be in peril if all the wasps died? would they be replaced by bigger, eviller things?

Where's kaol when you need him?
*shouts*
Oi, Kaol! Your knowledge is required!

edit@ Ms Drix - yes! wasps are evil and they don't even make honey like bees do.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:07, Reply)

Have you
...got a dart board? With a bit of judicious aiming you could impale the buzzing-wee-bugger (some pun intended)?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:08, Reply)

with the grammer badger's variation
you could even go a step further and make a hole in a jar lid that the wasp can easily get in but almost certainly won't be able to get out

the thing with the yoghurt pot though, is that while some will get stuck in there, not all will and it will keep them out of your office.

also means you don't end up with a jar full of wasps
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:11, Reply)

What do you want?
I'm busy.
*frowns*

If the wasps all went, we'd be over-run with caterpillars and other pest-like-insects.
This would lead to more birds, which would eat all the excess pests, then die off as there wouldn't be enough food for them.

So, lots of dead birds for a year or so.
( Cawl, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:11, Reply)

I don't much care for honey.
I like bees though. And wasps. And spiders and all kinds of things that we can't just kill because they're annoying us.

It's funny when the cat eats flies though.
( thealternativefact, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:19, Reply)

A jar full of wasps
Can then be left on someones desk you don't like with a note saying "Eat my sandwich again and I will find a jar big enough for you"

....Not that I would do that.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:20, Reply)

@ Kaol
yeah, but the cats could eat the dead birds, then there would be more kittums!

So, no wasps = more kittums.

Yay!
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 14:28, Reply)

@ Clendrix
I've seen one of my gerbils eat a fly. Thats an amusing spectacle to say the least!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 15:03, Reply)

A flexible plastic ruler can be sufficiently bent and flicked (kind of like if you were using it to propel say a paper ball).

Catch a wasp between this vicious weapon and window and you get a monster splat.

VERY FUNNY!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 15:04, Reply)

Cant go near
Thing is I'm too scared to be within 5 feet of them. At one point, I got trapped at my desk (odd curved shape) and i coudn't get out and I got so scared I nearly cut myself in two tryong to somehow walk through my desk backwards. There will be a bruise there in the morning... I'm a little wuss... I need a repellant that keeps them away from my desk completely!
(weekirst23 Is broken! Silly ice. Silly High heels!, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 15:09, Reply)

Dress like a wasp
but appear standoffish and aloof , the real wasp won't want to hang about with you .
(happyjoy last changed sig on, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 15:53, Reply)

Speak to it in a French accent.
Make sure you use phrases like "Zut alors!" and give a Gallic chortle through the nose (Hawnh hawnh hawnh!). That should be sufficient to drive it off- but if it doesn't, that will convince your colleagues that you've cracked and need the day off.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 13 Aug 2008, 16:07, Reply)

Make a wasp trap outside the window - either on the ledge or further away if you can
You'll need an old jam jar, preferably with a little jam still left in the bottom.

The important thing is to put some tin foil over the top, fasten it with an elastic band and punch some holes in it with a pencil. That last bit is the main bit - wasps cannot fly upside down (unlike bees apparently) so they try to come out and are faced by jagged bits of foil...bees will simply rotate themselves and buzz out and away. The wasps will be trapped - you can also put some water in the bottom so it's a sticky goo that they can drown in.

This also works well for fruit trees - plum trees in particular - hang these traps around the tree and the wasps will keep of your lovely succulent plums!

I think I heard this tip on Gardeners' Question Time - yes, I am that sad.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 13 Aug 2008, 16:54, Reply)

I've used these before
www.trapawasp.co.uk/bee_friendly_glass_wasp_trap.htm

They are very good. As chickenlady said I'd put them outside the window
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Wed 13 Aug 2008, 18:55, Reply)