Just filled in a tenant application form
Can't believe the shit they wanted to know. Couldn't submit it unless I told them my next of kin - including address, and email address. My next of kin doesn't HAVE an email address but, unless I put something in the box I couldn't submit it.
What the actual fuck. It's precisely 3/16 of fuck all to do with the application. I rang them. They were cocknuggets of the first water and couldn't see past their 'procedures'. Cunts, the lot of them and I hope they all die of cancer after seeing their children die in a fire.
Alt: How calm are you? Ready for the weekend?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 9 May 2014, 18:50, 37 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

They want to know it for a reason
If you're getting asked these questions feel confident.

It's my line of work - don't get upset.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 18:58, Reply)

alright 'captain flaccid'
Renting? How povvo.

My weekend will involve:

Buying a new jacket.

Testing out Allen & Heath mixers.

Buying classic hip hop.

Drinking with a b3toid.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 18:58, Reply)

Any classics in mind?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:27, Reply)

Yes, plenty ta.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:28, Reply)

Well thanks for being a Convo. killer :(

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:29, Reply)

I'm all up for a convo about using the A&H filters when mixing 4/4 stuff.
If that's any help.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:31, Reply)

yer, thinking about it I would rather stick to tennent application forms

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:33, Reply)

I could talk about Swiss Re 4/4's
That's something else.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:36, Reply)

MOAR like swiss rolls...
Yeah I'm calling you a fattie so what?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:37, Reply)

You are a ned.

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:41, Reply)

fuck you HH now I'm craving a swiss roll

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 9 May 2014, 20:50, Reply)

woah, insurance chat
A new low.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:38, Reply)

alt: totes calm captain, chillin with Lemmy innit

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:00, Reply)

you guys getting on well?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:01, Reply)

yeah hes cool
I got him a new ball today. He is showing classic signs of being content and happy.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:02, Reply)

Grace is like that.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:03, Reply)

its good having proper bent pets isnt it?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:03, Reply)

how cute is Lemmy?
Grace is proper cute.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:04, Reply)

What is Lemmy?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:06, Reply)

BUDGIE

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:07, Reply)

You need another.
Birds are pack critters - never keep a bird on it's own.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:09, Reply)

budgies are fine on their own with lots of attention which he gets

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:12, Reply)

No they're not
Birds are communal creatures and they need other birds to thrive. Keeping any bird on its own is cruel.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:15, Reply)

never keep a bird on it is own.
Got it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:13, Reply)

hes quite fluffy because hes only 9 weeks old, he goes all puffed up when hes tired, I like him hes wicked

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:06, Reply)

Grace started out silvery, then went golden and she's reverting to silvery again.
She loves a cuddle.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:08, Reply)

hes making new noises today, I reckon he will talk at some point

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:11, Reply)

All Grace has ever managed is a squeak.
How shit is that?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:14, Reply)

do hamsters make noise?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:15, Reply)

whiffling, occasional squeaks, mini sneezes
That's about it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:16, Reply)

its to make it harder for you to fleece them.
Prosecco plus gin and elderflower en route
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:00, Reply)

^ gay

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:02, Reply)

dur

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:52, Reply)

That's a lot of effort for a thread you aren't contributing to

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:32, Reply)

it's outside his contractual hours

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:34, Reply)

Don't let him catch you saying that
he will have you locked up, beaten and raped until you eventually hang yourself.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:36, Reply)

again.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:38, Reply)