So earlier...
I dropped my parents at the airport.
I pulled up, and they got out to get their bags from the boot.

While they were doing this, a po-lice man walked over to the car and tapped on my window.

I lowered it, and he said "Good afternoon sir. Once your passengers have gone, I'd like to have a chat with you."

Panic. Mental checklist: Coat-pocket Inventory:
One knife (legal).
Bottle of whisky (half empty).
Packet of cigarettes (full).

Ok...

"Sure officer."

He walks round to get in the passenger door, just as my Mum passes him.
She gives him a funny look, and says "Excuse me, I just need to give my son this", and passes me the fiver she'd borrowed earlier.

The Pig-man looks confused, says "He's your son? Oh..." then turned to me and said "That'll be all, thank you."

Then he wandered off.

What the fuck?
Suggestions?
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:11, 28 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

He probably
thought you were an illegal cabbie, they get a lot of them at airports... was it Heathrow or Stansted?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:19, Reply)

You naughty criminal-looking type...
Odds are it was a check for non-licenced Hire & Reward i.e. pikey taxis 'r' us.


Edit: Blimey O'Reilly, DiT, there's an echo in here
(osok Rebel without a clue, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:19, Reply)

He thought
you'd kidnapped them and forced them to smuggle drugs to another country for you.



or just that you were an illegal taxi driver
( Moey, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:19, Reply)

...
maybe he thought you were an illegal minicab driver or something

EDIT: as suggested above!
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:20, Reply)

Stansted
I've never heard of illegal cabbies before, how exciting!
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:20, Reply)

Or you had stolen the car!
You car thief looking person
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:22, Reply)

Or...
Maybe he wanted to gouge your eyes out, and skullfuck you?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:23, Reply)

perhaps he was a lonely orphan policeman
and thought you looked sympathetic and understanding and wanted to chat but then realised you weren't an orphan and so proceeded on his way in an orderly manner.

Or the unlicenced cab thing.
(happyjoy last changed sig on, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:23, Reply)

I wasn't wearing
My burglar hat :p
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:23, Reply)

Yep!
They hang around in airports, and pick unsuspecting tourists up.

They often say they're cheaper than normal taxis, but when you get to where you're going they add all sorts of other charges on and won't let you out of the car.

Sort of thing.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:23, Reply)

Hmmm...
I just assumed I "looked dodgy".
There we go though...

I look like a fake cab.
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:25, Reply)

maybe
he found himself attracted to you?

god knows why :)
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:30, Reply)

Or
He wanted a little cuddle.

Did you have your cuddling hat on?
( Moey, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:32, Reply)

Halfy...
Accurate as usual.

I don't have a cuddling hat.
Maybe life would be more fun if I did.
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:33, Reply)

I have
A granny fisting hat you can borrow?

cough cough Stansted.
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:37, Reply)

in agreement
with the illegal cabbie or perhaps a little hug.

Probably not wanting to gouge your eyes and skull fuck you as suggested by the Antichrist! Honestly, the youth of today (he's such a sweet little chap *ruffles hair and tickles under chin*)
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:38, Reply)

Granny fisting?
:(

I don't think that's my idea of a fun time.
Stansted... Yeah...

Also, Mr. H, someone we know has dropped another kid. Last Saturday.
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:38, Reply)

I heard
Apparently if they are girls im not allowed to date them.

Bah

I'd only be 50 by the time its legal, nowt wrong with that
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:43, Reply)

Hahaha!
Well, plenty more babies in the ward :p
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:47, Reply)

I must admit
I haven't seen her for years, probably much changed.

Did you know the Mocha was in The Times top 100 greasy spoons? quality!
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:57, Reply)

I read the first line
and saw 'parents' as 'pants'.

I really need to spend less time on here.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:58, Reply)

Excellent!
I never have enough time to go there for lunch.
Stupid 40-minute lunch-breaks.
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 15:59, Reply)

I worked there
in my yoof so used to get free food and tea.

The ham rolls are not as good but the no1 with beans and fried potatoes is a proper hangover cure
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 16:08, Reply)

I think Kaol
that he saw your sig. That could have made him think you were an illegal cabbie.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Wed 24 Sep 2008, 18:01, Reply)

Er...
Chicken/egg :p
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 18:08, Reply)

I'm glad I'm not the only one who read
"dropped my parents" as "dropped my pants"
( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Wed 24 Sep 2008, 19:00, Reply)

Oh dear...
Do I really inspire thoughts of public indecency?
( Cawl, Wed 24 Sep 2008, 19:06, Reply)

What kind of car have you got?
Anything that looks "minicab-ish" without taxi plates gets the sour eye from the local plod at Glasgow airport. Skoda Octavias and Citroen Xantias seem to get this treatment a lot.
(gordonjcp, Thu 25 Sep 2008, 15:20, Reply)