Long one (which I'm ashamed to say I have told in a restaurant with miming)
Two dwarves are pissed off with not getting any so decide to go to London and find some whores.

They book into the Hilton with adjoining hotel rooms, deposit their bags and go out for a couple of nerve steadying beers and in search of prostitutes. Upon finding a couple of likely looking ladies they secure their services for a night and make their way back to the hotel.

The first dwarf is mortified when he can't get a hard on for love nor money, so the brass starts playing with his balls, shoves her finger up his arse, sucking his dick and still nothing! The shame is compounded when he hears from his friends room "One, two, three HUP! and the bedhead slamming into the adjoining wall.

The little fella's so hacked off he pays the brass and gets his head down for the night. The next day his mate comes down to breakfast and asks how it went "A bloody nightmare" he says "I couldn't get a rise -she was playing with my balls, shoved her finger up my arse, sucked my dick and still sweet FA. It didn't help with you as well you bastard .... All that one, two, three HUP! business."

"Fuck off" says his mate "I couldn't get on the fucking bed."
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Tue 14 Oct 2008, 8:49, Reply)