Hmmm
Al grunted as Bert, still covered in blood, firmly gripped his sweaty shaft and heavily tugged the remnants of the burnt goat vagina free. It'd been a weird night. They'd been out to the pub for a few drinks, then had their usual hour long diversion to the local goat farm for a bit of light sado-masochistic goat bondage. Al had never suspected that Bert could go so far but, fighting to keep the bile down as he surveyed the carnage of limbs and muppet parts, he had to admit it had been an interesting evening.

They'd left the pub in Berts 1930 Bentley touring estate car. Bert had put on his goggles and cap, twiddled with the waxed ends of his moustache, whilst Al languidly reclined in the seat next to him, huffing paint stripper and giggling at the flashing lights that appeared before him. Bert had manfully opened the trottle and powered his throbbing beast to their usual hunting ground - Freeman's Goat Farm.

Al had watched with great excitement as Bert bent over to break open the lock on the gate... the way his leather trousers were taut across his iron buttocks. A few deft strokes with his tool, and Bert had the lock off. They were in.

The farm was dark, no sign whatsoever of Farmer Freeman, or his vicious pack of guard muppets. Al found himself sweating lightly in anticipation as they moved closer to the goatcoop. Bert lithely sprang through the window and opened the door from the inside.

The stench of fresh goat was overpowering... a miasma of goatsmell assailed Al's nostrils, he could barely contain himself and helped Bert to line the goats up into what they called their "Goat Harmonica". Bert started to strip out of his leather trousers, and Al was starting to grope the udders of a particularly fine goat when there was the ominous sound of a muppet outside.

Quick as a flash Al brought out his hunting knife and hid behind the door. Bert, more advanced in depravity, was already playing the Harmonica, and Al knew that from his expression he wasn't to be disturbed. The door creaked open slowly, and in came Big Bird. Al waited for Big Bird to come a few steps in, before leaping forth with a terrifying yell and burying his knife up to the hilt in Big Birds astonished face.

The giant chicked slumped, twitching. Al felt the gush of hot blood over him and felt a twinge of ecstacy. He closed the door and hauled the corpse to one side, before rejoining the grunting and sweating Bert. Al took out his pipe and filled it with heavy shag, lit it, and leaning against a post, wrapped in a heavy blue smoke, watched whilst Bert pounded away. Eventually with an animalistic yell, Bert finished and Al knew that it was his turn.

This was the part Al most enjoyed. The firm hairy haunches of the goat contrasting with the warm, forgiving inside. The way the horns provided a perfect handhold, the way the udder moved as he thrusted, hard and deep. Bert was watching, half smiling, as he cleaned himself with some straw. Al could feel that the goat was enjoying this, it pushed back against him in a most invigorating way.

Then they heard it. A noise outside. Bert motioned Al to continue, and went to check. He crept outside and almost immediately was thrown back in side as Farmer Freeman appeared with a shotgun and Elmo as a back up. Al watched in horror as Bert, Elmo, and Freeman descended into a brawling mass on the ground. He could only continue what he was doing as he saw Bert trampled and bitten. Somehow, Bert tore himself free and managed to knock Freeman out. Elmo was still up and fighting though, and now he produced a wicked switchblade from his pocket and circled Bert with it. Al was transfixed, he couldn't move for fear of what would happen.

Bert and Elmo circled each other for what seemed an age... Elmo moving the blade so that the light shone off it in the most lurid way... Bert inching his way around the goatcoop, his hand groping for something. Elmo was now right in front of Al and his goat when Bert acted...

Al gasped as Bert threw his paint thinner over Elmo and almost immediately threw a lighted match at him. The muppet writhed in agony as he danced about in flames.

It was only then that Al noticed that his goat was on fired too...
(Zapiola zip-zap-zop, Tue 3 Mar 2009, 15:42, Reply)