Becky just deleted an amusing thread about Bert's penis
so I thought I would put this here for anyone that wants to discuss either Bert, his penis, penii in general or AC/DC.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 10:58, 35 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

Well, about twenty seven years ago
your mum fell on a cock and then we arrive at the present day.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:03, Reply)

I don't think she said anything in particular about your cock
but I replied to the thread and then it was gone.

I think she said it filled her with longing.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:06, Reply)

Random Bert cock fact #27:
The top third of Bert's cock is prehensile, allowing it to surface and search for treasure, much like a rude flesh coloured periscope.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:08, Reply)

Seriously Bertie
considering that you were in a relationship at the time with the girl you're still with and we were both very drunk...why do you still keep harping on about it?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:08, Reply)

*pulls up chair*
*microwaves popcorn*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:09, Reply)

It's a joke?
that you cheated on the girl you love with me? Nice joke Bert. Ok, so you didn't cry when you left my place, that much is true. You had all the look of a man who is very guilty about you though. Why has that not retained enough for you to keep your mouth shut?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:15, Reply)

Umm, you just did
I bring it up from time to time as a joke

Now how about you shut up about it? It's never going to happen again no matter how much you want it to.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:21, Reply)

This thread does not contain enough acca dacca
On a scale of one to OMFGLOLMAZING! how excited are you about going to see DC tonight like me?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:23, Reply)

There is a possiblitity that I will be in attendance as well
but I'm not sure yet as I'm feeling a bit queasy.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:24, Reply)

AC/DC?
My housemate went to see them at Greenwich on Tuesday night, and apparently they were all of teh win.

But was anyone else listening to Radio 4 at about 8 o'clock this morning? We were treated to a short snippet of Highway to Hell - turns out that this little classic has now superseded certain traditional hymns on a list of songs chosen to be played at one's funeral...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:27, Reply)

I'm sorry?
What? Come again? You might decide not to watch teh Rock n Roll train burst through the back of the stage because you're feeling "a bit queasy".

MAN THE FUCK UP!
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:28, Reply)

But I have the ills
and they're not nice. I went to college with one of the daughters of the band, so it's not like I haven't seen them before.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:29, Reply)

Yeah, I heard
that on Radio 4. Made me laugh.

I'm going our to "Killed by Death" by Motorhead. I'm going to make it very explicit in my will, i've already told the Mrs, she's not happy.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:29, Reply)

I've seen them before too,
but they are very unlikely to do another tour after this one because they are too old.

Which ones daughter do you know?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:30, Reply)

Too old?
Doesn't seem to have discouraged the Stones...

As for my own funeral, I'm toying with Dirt in the Ground by Tom Waits. The congregation will probably all top themselves and be buried with me.

Or possibly I Take a Look at my Enormous Penis by Da Vinci's Notebook...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:31, Reply)

Dunno, she's called Cara Young and was in my film clases
I think she's Malcolm's daughter. He looks like Iggy pop in the flesh :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:33, Reply)

I shall slowly roll towards the crematorium furnace to....
Fish heads by Barnes and Barnes.


Suitably surreal methinks.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:34, Reply)

I just looked up "Fish Heads" on ootube
It has to be one of the most bizarre things I've seen in quite some time...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:42, Reply)

*munches No3l's popcorn*
*nudges No3l*

Good scene this. I like the bit where Becky calls him a tosser for cheating on his girl but doesn't mention whether she knew about her and Bert asserts his manlyness by telling her/us he was blind drunk but could still get it up.

Al, I'm this excited: :0|

Look, look how excited I am: :0|
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 11:58, Reply)

psst Oli
I'm still unsure whether it's real or not...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:03, Reply)

naa, not really that interested
:-P
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:06, Reply)

saucy
*growls like a tiger*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:16, Reply)

*spluffs*

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:18, Reply)

*wallows*

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:19, Reply)

*doesn't*

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:23, Reply)

*looks shocked*
*takes handful of No3l's popcorn*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:29, Reply)

Stop it!
You're all revelling in my painful memories!
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:30, Reply)

*revels*
speaking of revels, why on earth did they think it was a good idea to advertise them like this "buy these, there's a 1 in 5 chance that you will find the sweet you eat disgusting"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:35, Reply)

Revels
Sweetie Russian roulette.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:40, Reply)

Because most fatties ain't fussy.
I'm not fond of the orange ones, but I still eat them.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:42, Reply)

Hahaha
Fattie...
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 12:56, Reply)

@chickenlady
Particularly if you have a potentially fatal peanut allergy...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 13:13, Reply)

I have a potentially fatal
spunk allergy
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 13:19, Reply)

One word Al...
Duck!

*fires*
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Thu 16 Apr 2009, 14:02, Reply)

Revels
No longer have peanuts.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 16 Apr 2009, 15:02, Reply)