New game
Take a headline and "Daily Express-erise" it. Here's one, though it is on the Daily Mail site, you get the idea.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1196726/Boy-14-banned-school-having-moustache--father-says-hes-young-shave.html

"Immigrant scum disrupts our schools and there's nothing you can do about it"
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 14:34, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Another
www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/government-to-assume-control-of-east-coast-main-line-1726367.html

"Brown's secret plan to turn Britain into a Communist dictatorship"
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 14:40, Reply)

Here's one
Story about the heatwave:
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8128382.stm

Daily Heil / Express version:

"IMMIGRANTS BRING WEATHER WITH THEM: HOW BRITONS ARE DYING IN 32 DEGREE HEAT. BLAME THE IRANIANS"
(hangableautobulb is an anagram of the best album ever, on, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 14:42, Reply)

Or
"Immigrants from hotter climates capable of toppling government whilst Britain sizzles"
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 14:46, Reply)