I am a fully blown Scottish cunt
and I've been to a few Burns suppers. Just read the fucking thing, this website seems to have a good "phonetic" way of writing:

www.robertburns.org/works/147.shtml

Can't go wrong - if you're not Scottish there's no point trying to mimmick the accent. Read it like it's written above.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:08, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

By the way
Haggis Neeps and Tatties is up there with my favourite meals ever.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:09, Reply)

I had haggis in Edinburgh
it was yummy. Kaol worked his way through every scottish food going. Except deep friend mars bars I think. And that was mainly because we didn't see anywhere that did them
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:10, Reply)

Haggis is marvellous.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:13, Reply)

Gawd those deep fried Mars bars are disgusting
It is annoying they've become associated with Scotland because essentially it was a chavvy chip shop owner who stuck whatever he could find in the deep fat fryer. Nobody even likes it it's a gimmick!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:13, Reply)