You should never have to fake it
You do that and he'll think he's doing it right. Tell him how to do it properly and warn him there'll be no heaad otherwise. It's the only way he'll learn
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:42, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

^
clearer than my response
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Perhaps we should construct some sort of easy-to-understand how-to guide to finding and manipulating the clitoris

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:45, Reply)

hmm
'The Dummies Guide to the Clitoris'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:53, Reply)

*laugh*

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:54, Reply)

It would sell
But not over the counter. We'd have to do it mail order. No man in the world would walk up to a chap in Waterstones and ask for the Dummies Guide to the Clitoris. Might as well be wearing a badge saying "I am shit in bed"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:58, Reply)

or a badge
saying 'my other body is a sex God'
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:59, Reply)

I could do with one of those

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:28, Reply)

we could sell those as well

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:32, Reply)

We need a female equivalent
Possibly "I'll be using these to my advantage" for the bustier lady
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:37, Reply)

An entire range
with complimentary unmarked packaging for the book, so the neighbours just think you're getting a vibrator instead
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:45, Reply)

Perhaps on the outside of the packaging it should say
"For the man with an Armadillo in his trousers" so the recipient looks like a well-hung Spinal Tap afficonado to onlookers
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:49, Reply)

Yeah, I tried that
Didn't work. And it was easier to finish myself with the toys.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:49, Reply)