My daughter seemed to go through all of the potty training stuff pretty well except for one incident when she was around two..
My girlfriend and step-daughter were away in Canada to attend the wedding of my girlfriend's Dad. I had taken the week off work to look after my daughter and all had gone well. One evening whilst she was playing with her dolls I nipped upstairs to set the bath running for her pre bed bath. When I came back down she had not only done a poo, but had decided to use it to "draw" on the television (this was well before Chris Ofili started using poo in his paintings, the bloody copy-cat.) I kept calm and didn't make a fuss. I just got her in the bath and off to bed. I then set about the task of cleaning the telly. Baby wipes sorted the screen pretty quickly, but she'd managed to shove some into the holes that allow the sound out of the speakers, and into those red, yellow and white AV sockets. This required delicate ear bud and coctail stick work, and to ensure that I didn't simply push the poo into the television, taking the casing off. It took bloody ages, but my overwhelming thought whilst doing was that the most important thing was not to have a heart attack and die as this would mean
1. My daughter would be alone.
and
2. Imagine being found, by someone who wouldn't know what had happened, on plastic sheet in the lounge surrounded by shit-tipped cotton buds and cocktail sticks with a part diassembled television. It would look like whilst my girlfriend was away I was induilging in some bizarre mild electrocution/faeces related auto erotic shenanigans that combined the worst of Michael Hutchence and Chuck Berry's indulgences.
(Cave Duck, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 11:02, Reply)