It's been varied, I must say.
Daddy Maladicta is unimpressed with my situation; like most fathers, he wants the best for his kids but is sadly out of touch with the real world, still believing that there is a magical thing called a "graduate job" that will take anyone from any degree course and train them up to be anything if they've never had a job ever. He also dislikes my decision to live with Mr Maladicta on the grounds that we are "living in sin", despite not having a religious bone in his body (he refused to be listed as a guarantor for us, which we need as we're both under 25, on the flat we are - hopefully - signing for sometime this week on these grounds). This has resulted in tears, yelling and a boyfriend who is very reluctant to ever be in the same room as my father again.

Ironically, my Catholic nan, who I usually paraphrase Zero Punctuation in describing as "a hybrid of Hitler and Skeletor, whose very piss is pure liquid malevolence" (we don't get on, usually, on account of me being a slightly overweight girly who can't drive), is perfectly fine with the whole arrangement, despite having only learned of Mr Maladicta's existence less than a week ago and having never met him. She said "you have to do what makes you happy."

Mummy Maladicta isn't really big on the whole advice thing but she has provided me with a few gems, mostly to do with relationships:

"If you can't be good, be careful. Just DO NOT get pregnant."
"If a man hits you, leave him. Don't believe he won't do it again, no matter how sorry he says he is, just go."

So far, so normal.

"Don't get married, Maladicta. See the world."

In fairness, this was after a row with my dad.

During a conversation on the phone where I told her I'd had a dodgy stomach for a few days and said I'd not been doing anything to cause it, meaning not undercooking my food or overdoing the alcomahol; however, she came out with this gem:

"If a man wants to have anal sex with you he's perverted and he doesn't love you."

WTF, mother?
( Maladicta, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 0:08, 12 replies)

@ ancrenne
I will pass on clickyhugs at my graduation ceremony in a couple of weeks :) the reason she says that is my auntie, her sister, married a man who knocked her about, including while she was pregnant, and it took her far too long to get shot of the fucker.
( Maladicta, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 0:49, closed)

a hybrid of hitler and skeletor
deserves a click.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 1:40, closed)

No Hitting..
.
I agree. There's never an excuse to hit a woman (or a child for that matter). Being drunk, depressed, stressed, whatever - there's no excuse. And if they do it once, no matter how sorry they say they are, they'll do it again.

And, conversely, women really shouldn't hit men either. It's cowardly and unfair as a *real* man won't retaliate.

In my time I've been kicked, punched, bitten, poked in the eye (and that fucking *hurt*)and had various objects thrown at me. Strangely enough, it was all the same girl. In the end, I left.

But I never laid a finger on her in retaliation . But looking back, I should have left much earlier.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 5:20, closed)

Bumlove
between a man and a woman is an act of profound love and trust - your Mum doesnt know what she's missing - send her round ;)
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 8:40, closed)

Clickage for
not staying with someone who hits you and for randomness of anal
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 8:55, closed)

...
It's hard to disagree with the idea that A hitting B is, in most cases, twattish and indefensible. What I don't understand is why the sex of A and B should make a difference.

I also think that violence is sometimes justifiable - again, though, I don't think the sex makes any odds. If someone is about to injure me and the only way to stop them is a (proportionate and no-harder-than-necessary) thump, then they'll get thumped. I'll worry about the chromosomes later.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 10:12, closed)

I think Enzyme has a good point there...
If someone is about to injure me and the only way to stop them is a (proportionate and no-harder-than-necessary) thump, then I'll bumsex them.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 10:47, closed)

*click*
70% because I love your mum's quotes.
30% because you went to uni at Kent and that's where I'm going in September. :D
(TheHBoxster is probably playing Beatles Rock Band on, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 12:36, closed)

I agree with Enzyme
I will never ever ever ever hit a woman through drink, rage, etc. BUt years of Jiu Jitsu has taught me it doesn't matter who you are, if you kick off, expect to be hit back. Always with appropriate force, no more.
(Teran Thinks Pogonophobia is funny, Mon 23 Jun 2008, 15:48, closed)

I think Tourettes would agree with you on the hitting bit.
Her ex (Greek) fiance kicked seven shades of shit out of her for no reason one night.

While she was pregnant.

She got the next plane off the island and has never seen him since. Through a one-off act of utter cuntishness, he lost all rights to ever be part of his son's life.

If only more people had this sort of courage.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 24 Jun 2008, 13:02, closed)