not-so-fun house
partial pea
if you ever went to blackpool funhouse before it burned down, chances are you'll remember the death slide. it was about 30 feet high, but to a kid, it seemed like a hundred. i loved that slide.
one particularly hot summer's day, my parents had taken us kids to blackpool for a day trip. we'd been to the sandcastle and, as it was so blisteringly hot, mum let us keep our swimming costumes on when we went to the fair.
as i always did at the fair, i went straight on the monster, then into the funhouse and headed for the slide.
for the love of mother theresa's sainted clopper, NEVER try to go down an almost-vertical wooden slide in a swimming costume. within the first 5 feet, i'd realised my mistake and stood up, which was mistake number 2. i tried to run down the slide, fell, skidded on my face all the way to the bottom, then crashed into the side and felt my little toe go *crunch*
i went home that day with a goodish-sized piece of skin missing from each arsecheek, a broken toe and a skinned nose and chin.
as if that wasn't bad enough, when the funhouse burned, that fucking clown outside survived.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 29 Jul 2010, 23:40, 11 replies)

Bloody Hell
That's just given me a flashback. I'd forgotten I'd been to Southport as a kid and I've just had a memory of getting a friction burn going down that slide.

BURN FUNHOUSE, BURN.
(Hagis, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 0:08, closed)

probably because
i meant to type blackpool. no wonder you didn't remember!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 0:15, closed)

We have similar injuries from different situations.
A few weeks after I got my arm injury I was listening to someone on the tv talking and heard something that I deemed was the most idiotic thing uttered and walked back to the tv room and snapped my pinky toe on a shoe that was in the way.

I honestly can't remember what I heard that caused the angry walk.
(Ingrid Leinhard is not a real thing, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 2:11, closed)

arf!
that snap just makes your brain go "oh, no...."
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 13:53, closed)

That's an evil motherfucking clown!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 12:55, closed)

i hate that fucking clown!

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 13:53, closed)

Last time I went, I dropped my ice cream in front of it
It started laughing, so I gave it the fingers and ran off. That showed it...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 14:37, closed)

hahaha!
my brother used to hide behind it and freak me out :(
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 15:56, closed)

I don't think it required any help...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 16:31, closed)

i know
but my brother's a cunt
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 30 Jul 2010, 23:17, closed)

All brothers are...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 2 Aug 2010, 9:12, closed)