British Tourists in Spain.
OK you fat hairy beer belly mongs. The temperature is only 25C. You do NOT, and i repeat do NOT need to sit outside a skanky british restaurant without so much of even a t-shirt on. Other diners do not want to see sweat dribbling down your fat wrinkly torso whilst eating.

Quite why restaurant owners even allow these fat naked blobs to sit there like this is perhaps more of an annoyance than the disgusting lumps themselves.
Its only 25C its not fucking 60. Get a grip. If its too hot for you, try holidaying in Iceland instead.

And thats another thing. You fucking british mong faced twats. Dont go to foreign countries parading around with Union Jack shorts on. No one is impressed, the locals certinately arent. Dont act like youre far away from home. Youre not, you fell off a short haul flight, and are one of many thousands that come here each year. The locals are used to you, and only put up with you because you give them money.
Your money allows them to live here, so that they can enjoy sea sun and sand every day, unlike you miserable lot who only get it for a couple of weeks a year.

And another thing, dont complain when its raining. The weather doesn't change just because your easyjet flight is landing. It may piss it down for 2 weeks, but you can be sure in the knowledge that once you fuck off it will get sunny again.

And another thing, in europe like the majority of the world. We drive on the RIGHT, thats right, its not hard to remember is it. The Right side of the road, is the right. So stop f*cking driving on the left. The other day i had to break for some fuckwit on the wrong side of the road, and this was an hour away from the airport. Did you not notice that everyones on the right?? If you cant grasp the simple concept of switching to the other side then take the bus.

Thats my rant for now. Its not even tourist season yet and the funs already starting.
(Miggyman, Sun 4 May 2008, 19:54, 2 replies)

*sodding great standing ovation*
Also: "Dont act like youre far away from home". Hell yes, especially since the average day's activities (in this foreign land that they chose to fly to) consist of sitting in English theme pubs called 'The Rose and Crown' scoffing fish and chips washed down with pints of Fosters, reading day-old copies of the Sun then prising their fat sweaty arses out of their seats to waddle back to the hotel in the evening, just in time for the English cabaret show, disco and Jim Davidson tribute acts, accompanied by endless pints of Carling.
(costas, Sun 4 May 2008, 20:36, closed)

lol
yup you put it better than I did!
I take it youre in Spain too?

I love the fakeness down here aimed at the brits. Shitty names for pubs. Yes we have "The Queens Vic" and "The Rovers Return" and shops such as "Spainsburys"

And theres a radio ad on an expat radio station for Manilva motors, with a guy trying to sound like Jeremy Clarkson and failing miserablly and the top gear music in the backgound.

And why is it, that when you meet a dolled up expat they have the strongest essex accent known to man?
(Miggyman, Sun 4 May 2008, 20:52, closed)