"Best friend's a Computer Boffin"
Every time someone says that to me I want to smack them repeatedly in the face. No, your best friend isn't a computer boffin; they can just about get Solitaire running, they've never heard of a dll for fuck's sake.

Spoke to one granny who called work once, claiming her router was working fine and we (as in me company) weren't providing a service to her. I ask how she's so sure and she said "Me neighbour works for Microsoft, he's on good terms with Bill Gates."
I check her address and she lived in Swansea (and rather curiously about 5 mins from me old address). I forgot to realize that someone living just outside of Swansea City Centre is working on a daily basis with Mr Gates, then taking time out to fix elderly people's wireless routers. Daft old cunt.

Yes, if you're a "Best Friend Computer Boffin", I'll fecking twat you if I meet you. The amount of grief, arguments and money spent due to bad advice given by these people is enough to bankcrupt Argentina all over again.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Mon 5 May 2008, 19:04, 4 replies)

See also:
My "insert appropriate relative" is high up in XYZ company, and he/she told me that you can't do what you're doing. Oh, really? Well we just did.

OR

My mate down the Legion / Bingo / Doctor's waiting room says that ..... followed by some load of tosh.

I love customers, don't you?
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Mon 5 May 2008, 19:31, closed)

Got nothing against customers....
...just as long as they listen to what you tell them. They call us for advice and a high % of them discount it immediately. Oh sorry, were you ringing to prove me wrong? I must update my job description to "Technical Wiki", where anyone can edit what I know to what they think they know. Won't fix your fecking issue but you'll feel great in the knowledge of me giving out bad information to every customer on your say-so.

Yeah you could say they hit a nerve.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Mon 5 May 2008, 19:43, closed)

just so you know
some of us IT illeterates do have friends who are very good at their (IT) job, and will actualy help us poor mortals now and again.

name of boffin friend witheld to prevent twatting cos he is a B3Tan too
(Patfish, Mon 5 May 2008, 21:03, closed)

not targeting actual boffins
just the ones who know feck all but make out that they're brill to keep in the public goodbooks.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Mon 5 May 2008, 22:27, closed)