Not traumatic for me as such but I nearly gave myself a hernia laughing.
Sheffield gets a lot of bad press regarding its public transport system. To be fair as if you don't live on the tramline you're stuck with First (the worst) Buses.

Being fortunate enough to live slap bang in the middle of the City Centre I am able to catch trams to just about anywhere that I may need to be.

Right so having begun the trip out towards the cinema just outside the City Centre I am happily sat upon the tram as we pass through the outskirts of Sheffield. As the Tram arrives at the Attercliffe stop for whatever reason the driver has pushed the wrong button in the cab and both sets of doors have opened. Nothing overly fascinating in that. My attention is drawn away from the extra set of open doors to an elderly lady in her mobility scooter. The tram platform and the entrance to the tram are about level, occasionally there is a lip of a couple of inches.

As the lady is trying to get the scooter on to the tram she is hitting the lip. The conductor makes his way down and utters the immortal line.

"Jus' rev it me duck, you'll be reet"

She follows these instructions with aplomb. Backing the scooter up about ten feet. She hits the accelerate and becomes a blur. She hits the little lip buggy bounces up into the tram. Sadly she didn't apply the brakes as quickly and promptly shot out the (mistakenly) open doors opposite landing on the opposite side of the track and crashing into the platform.

To this day it is probably one of the funniest things I have ever seen.

The conductors reaction was just as funny. After looking through the doors to make she was ok, which she was, he simply called after nher

"Look here Penelope Pitstop, this is a tram stop not the start line in Wacky Races"

I have never had the misfortune to simultaneously wet myself and soil myself but i was pretty fucking close that day.






Length she went a good six feet past the tram before she landed.
(kickstandrich last had sex with your mum/sister/wife/daughter on, Fri 30 May 2008, 20:42, 5 replies)

Paints an excellent image.
*click*
(Sundayturkey has the biggest mug of tea, Fri 30 May 2008, 21:35, closed)

they're bastard things to control
no brakes, you see. There's a single lever on the handlebars - push for forwards, pull for backwards. If you take your hands away from the lever, it goes to the neutral position and the scooter supposedly stops, but there's no means for hard/soft braking.

Oh, and the other 'safety feature' is that there's always a couple of seconds delay between holding/releasing the lever, and the scooter responding. The theory is that it stops the scooter jolting because someone's bumped the driver's elbow. The reality is that it makes precision manoeuvreing impossible.
( Batsgirl, Fri 30 May 2008, 23:07, closed)

hehe
Thats a good old click there. Unfortunately I have lived in Sheffield for a year now and have yet to take the tram (although I have taken the 77A bus to the city centre).
(powervator and NONE SHALL PASS, Sat 31 May 2008, 0:13, closed)

ah, sheffield trams
when i first went from the university to the train station, i didnt realise it was going to do that little detour around the back of the buildings and end up at the BACK of the station. the back of the station doesn't really look like a stop.

i wonder how many first year students the conductor has had to deal with looking up at them with wide eyes and going "where are we???"
(ladyintheradiator, Sat 31 May 2008, 2:59, closed)

Sheffield Trams
I remember being at school when they said they were bringing trams to Sheffield. We couldn't wait - better than the shitty Mainline buses.

And then someone had the brilliant idea of building the tramlines in places where the population density rivals Greenland. Oh.
(scentless_apprentice takes two bottles into the shower!, Sat 31 May 2008, 22:44, closed)