"Oh I wanna be your Custard sliiiice!"
Many years ago my mate and his good lady moved to a villiage south of Leicester (No thats not the funny part). As part of our manly duties we sought out the pubs in the area for a place to escape.

One of the pubs we went into became a firm favourite. It was an old fashioned boozer. Nope none of that oak and fireplace crap for this place it was a place to drink. It even had the old fashinoed meat raffle and strange blokes asleep in the gents! We walked in and all the locals shifted nervously in their seats. We were being watched as we ordered our beery goodness.

By our second trip to this pub we were now "regulars". I think we must have been the first new customers in decade. But one night was extra special they had a live band on. The night wasn't too bad. I was trying not to get stabbed by the guy staring daggers at me because his girlfriend is locked to the side of me giving me the eye while my mate is pushing me in her direction.

Anyhoo this band weren't too bad but one like will stick burned forever in my memory. I tuned into what the singer was shouting when he then sang (Best read in gruff northern accent) "Oh I wanna be your Custard sliiiice!".

The local nutter at the pub near me pales into comparison (He mimed on the karaoke).

Face it you're envious of the length but remember its the girth that provides the mirth.
(YellowZed, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 20:58, Reply)