Crap Date Stories?
A few years back I was at college in Gosport which is across Portsmouth Harbour from Portsmouth. It was nearly Christmas and the girlfriend was going shopping with her friends for the late night opening. Would I like to go along too?

We walked down to the ferryport on a crisp December night with everyone all excited about Chrimbo and what not. We got on the Gosport Ferry which chugs over to the city and the two of us sat on the top with her friends below deck.

We sat, cuddled together, kissing in the night with HMS Warrior's main mast decorated in lights which danced on the water's surface. A gentle drizzle began to fall but the happy couple, her and me, stayed on top of the boat.

When we reached Portsmouth there was a gentle bump as the boat tied up and her friends called up to us "Come on you two! Let's go!". Being a gentleman I let her walk down the steps first before I followed.

At this point I slipped on the top step and grabbed at the wet railing. You can't hold on to a wet railing so I started to slide down the steps like an experienced sailor in a war film. I couldn't stop!

BANG

I kicked by beautiful girlfriend in both shoulder blades at one and floored her in front of her open-mouthed mates. Slowed down only slightly by the impact I continued down the rails until I reached the bottom where she lay.

BANG

I landed standing on both of her ankles which twisted her feet outwards. At this point she screamed attracting the attention of large group of festive shoppers who turned to watch a maniac student stamp on his girlfriend.

Her friends never liked me and we broke up a few months later.

So yeah, crap date stories are always fun.
(castro, Sat 29 May 2004, 18:42, Reply)