School teachers and the way you harassed them
Or...myths about school teachers that came true.

We had an English teacher called Miss Toft (true) somehow we found out she used to be a lifeguard, and took great pleasure taking turns just shouting "RED BANDS OUT" for no reason.

We also had a stand in teacher for science that we called Mr NippleHead simply because he had a fucking massive nipple on his bald head.

The best and strangest though was an English teacher called Miss Croft who was really sexy, half way through our last year she vanished. The rumour, which was widely accepted as the gospel truth was that she had died from cancer at the age of 27. Even the staff seemed to go along with this when the subject was raised. Then about 12 years after leaving school I am sat in a restaurant little posh place, tables too close to one another and shit candles that kind of posh, sat with my girlfriend when I look to the left and there she is, Miss Croft...I had to do a double take. Started explaining to my girlfriend why I looked like I had seen a ghost, when Miss Croft leant over said hello and that she must look really good for a dead woman.
( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:39, 2 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Mr Hurst.
Best history teacher ever; turned up 5 minutes late to practically every lesson wheeling the TV cabinet*.

The schedule:
The World At War
The Nazis: A Warning From History
Blackadder

To reward him for such awesomeness, we would do things like all going to hide in the stationary cupboard until he arrived muttering "where the fuck are they?" and then left again, then we'd all quietly file out of the cupboard set up our desks and pretend we were there all along.

*to be fair, he did engage us in excellent discussions about what we watched, rather than just shoving something on out of laziness.
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 12:05, Reply)

Haha brilliant.
We (me and 3 lads I shared a dodgy science desk with Bunsen burners on) once set Fire to the science labs walls.

We thought it would be funny to burn some of those 3D shapes the wankers that had done physics had made and stuck to the wall so they stuck out. We were only supposed to burn one while Mrs peters was out of the room. We set fire to the whole wall and then the room. When the firebrigade turned up one of the 4 of us was still in the room that was on fire, huddled in the gas chemical Perspex wall thingy (I dunno what it's called) he was treated like a hero for getting everyone out of the room and then using his brain and hiding where the smoke couldn't get to him.

Where as in fact it was that cunt that started the fire. They made him an honorary Fire marshall for both the school and the North wests Fire department he was in the paper and everything the fucking pyromaniac
( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 12:46, Reply)