The paper round thing
I had a teenage paper round, where a chain smoker known locally as Darth Vader (on account of his ceaseless 40-a-day-habit wheezing) paid me 50p a day to deliver newspapers.

I soon found, to my disgust, that the village's other newsagent paid their paperboys a whole, shiny pound per day, but Darth was adamant that "there are gasp plenty of other kids gasp willing to work gasp for peanuts, and you can gasp fuck right off gasp if you don't like it".

You didn't even get extra for Fridays, where everybody in the village got the Maidenhead Advertiser, a doorstop of a publication that never weighed in at less than 100 pages.

Well, sod that, I went and found myself a weekend job in a supermarket where I got to watch people having loads of sex, and worked out a week's notice for Darth.

Still pissed at his attitude, I gave everybody's paper to the house next door, and all the Advertisers went to the last house on the round, who just happened to be the village doctor.

I popped into Darth's shop the next day to pick up my money, just in time to see Dr Thomas storming out, veins bulging on his forehead in fury.

"You gasp cunt" said Darth. I didn't get paid, but I was already on Easy Street. One pound ten per hour. One pound fucking ten. Stick that in your pipe, Vader.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 22 May 2008, 12:52, 3 replies)

Maidenhead?
Aha, a fellow Maidonean? Or whatever the hell they're supposed to be.

Yes, the Maidenhead Advertiser is STILL 100 odd pages thick and full of 'Cat stuck up of tree' stories mixed in with the 'armed robbery at co-op' stories. Only it's 40p now, and comes in very handy for 'carpeting' the floor when you are houstraining the puppy..
( Bathory, Thu 22 May 2008, 23:26, closed)

Call Of Duty
Do you play call of duty 4 online?
(Lukekull Fuck, Sun 25 May 2008, 2:21, closed)

That's a bit blummin' random
No. I don't.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Mon 26 May 2008, 13:26, closed)