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This is a question Random Acts of Evil

Mr Twisty Cheeky asks: As a contrast to last week's question - Has anyone ever been evil to you, out of the blue, for no reason? Have you ever been total twuntcake against all logic?

(, Thu 16 Feb 2012, 18:49)
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It was a Sunday afternoon... that will live in infamy
I was washing up. I know, big intro. For some reason which escapes me now, I was listening to Radio 1 - maybe they'd promised a live teabagging of a heavily sedated Vernon Kay, or something. This is back when CBBC's Dick and Dom had somehow bagged a lunchtime slot with their "unique" brand of "hilarity". Focusing on a particularly stubborn non-stick pan (was it fuck), it took me a minute to realise that the voice of the caller on the radio belonged to my best mate's girlfriend.

This was not my random act of evil, but hers. And I doubt I will ever top it.

I listened to her banter with the hosts about having recently met Jason Donovan and the colour of her hair that week, amazed at her hitherto untapped ability to go three words without saying "fuck". Then came the inevitable shout out section to conclude the call. Was there anyone she'd like to say hi to?

"Yes, my boyfriend Jamie, he's here in the car with me, say hello!"

Dick and Dom courteously reply "Hi Jamie!", unaware of the downturn his day was about to take.

"Oh thanks, that's made his day, because JAMIE LOVES DICK!! JAMIE REALLY REALLY LOVES DICK!!!"

To this day I am impressed that there was no dead air following this. Audibly stunned, Dick himself replied with "Er, haha, thanks, but are you sure he's not more of a Dom fan?"

I swear I could hear him crossing his fingers. It didn't work.

"No I'm more of a Dom fan but JAMIE LOVES DICK!!!"

The call was terminated shortly thereafter. Its legacy lives on, however. Jamie's better (ha!) half downloaded the podcast, cut the WAV file and saved it to her phone. For six months thereafter, any text she received caused her phone to announce her boyfriend's love of cock.

Girls = evil.
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 9:56, 12 replies)

(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 9:57, closed)
Saying CuntyFuckNuts would have been better.

(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 9:57, closed)
that was part of their schtick.
they asked everyone who called in if they loved dom or dick. the joke was to say that you loved dick. you dick.
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 10:07, closed)
True enough
A tradition they started after the call I describe. Top quality trolling as always, take some points.
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 10:38, closed)
wait, are you alleging that your friend's girlfriend started this whole thing?
because i would call that a lie.
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 10:40, closed)
I don't follow the chronology of childish Radio 1 shows slavishly
What I do know is that the call I describe precedes the first instance I heard of their "Do you love Dom - or do you love Dick?" thing, which I will accept could easily have started earlier for all I know.
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 10:46, closed)
I still maintain that it would have been better if she'd shouted CuntyFuckNuts.
Especially if they'd decided to adopt that phrase instead of 'I love Dick'
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 11:40, closed)
I want to argue with you but my current state of "officelol" suggests that to do so would be dishonest
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 11:42, closed)
Amusingly, Dom is almost as sexual as Dick.
I mean in this context...
... rather than through a Saturday Morning TV experience I don't want to talk about except to my analyst/therapist.
(, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 13:14, closed)
that sucks
(, Sat 18 Feb 2012, 0:21, closed)
This is properly awesome...

Apologies for my late reply...I've been away. I will now give this the click it most heartily deserves.
(, Mon 20 Feb 2012, 15:58, closed)
Thank you kindly sir
Hope you had a good trip
(, Thu 23 Feb 2012, 7:47, closed)

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