random embarrassment
I have a 2 and a half year old daughter who lets out the dirtiest loudest fruitiest farts. These should be released randomly throughout the day. so why does she always choose to let rip when we're on public transport? and why seemingly always within earshot of attractive women? I'm convinced there's a correlation between the attractiveness of the woman and amount of effort and ooomf she puts into the delivery

if you hear a loud fruity rasp and turn around to see a cute as a button toddler in pigtails and polka dot dress sitting next to an unshaven rough around the edges man turning the colour of ripe beetroot. who're you going to blame?

I love her to death but riding the bus with her is nerve racking, the little shit!
( Clay hopes this bit is long enough to promote my websi, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 20:18, 2 replies)

Teach her
to say "pardon me" when she farts or, preferably, "no follow through this time daddy!" as she high fives you.
( SteamedCleaner, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 0:29, closed)

I'm quite flatulent.
No biggy for me - I just tend to enjoy going outside in the wind to unleash the parp! My youngest daughter loves letting a little 6 yo. peep out occasionally & then she tries to blame her dad. Rarely works tho cause I usually have a full-blown trombone medley ready as proof that it was her & not me! ;)
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Fri 22 Apr 2011, 5:51, closed)