I dated a vegan
And I loved her, I truly did and I completely respected her beliefs. I understood why she was vegan, the ethical ramifications, the shit she would get casually from strangers when she had to reveal her dietary choice-people would be cruel and flippant and actively taunt her, even though she did not force her beliefs on anyone and simply explained why she believed what she did.

She inflicted these beliefs on no one except me. I could not eat meat around her. I could not talk about eating meat around her. I could not have my own choice in what I ate. I was, as her partner, an extension of her choice.

Then came the day when I lent my mate money for a kebab and she punched me. That's when I knew it was over.

And my first girlfriend was just all the arseholes in the world rolled into one gaping, all encompassing whole. There aren't words. Truly. But that was a decade ago so fuck her, water under the bridge right?

(Sort of. I still secretly hope she's addicted to crack in a council house.)
(orestes is shitting in the 1940s, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 2:41, 12 replies)

I quote
"rolled into one gaping, all encompassing whole"
Pfffffffft!
( Infidel , shit and wrong, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 3:00, closed)

you have no idea
truly, she was an epic bumhole. an echoing chasm of pure arseholeitude. the woman was a rectum. she was the goatse man.
(orestes is shitting in the 1940s, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 4:42, closed)

'I dated a Vegan'
made me laugh for some reason. Having been one myself once I get it. I just knew it would all end in tears.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 3:03, closed)

I Gotta Ask

Do vegans give blow-jobs?

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 7:06, closed)

It's OK if you don't swallow

(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 9:56, closed)

No idea, I'm a girl.
Good question though.
(orestes is shitting in the 1940s, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 15:58, closed)

I've always wondered.....
If hippy vegan mothers breastfeed.

The hippy nurturing sidde would want to breastfeed until the kid is about 10, the vegan side does not allow the consumption of milk.

Also, as far as Im aware, you can't feed a newborn on soy or rice milk.

Answer me that vegans....
( user_names_suck, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 22:29, closed)

I still secretly hope she's addicted to crack in a council house

She is. It's my [arse] crack.
(Large Hardon Collider Bah Bloody Humbug, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 7:50, closed)

church
Do Catholic Vegans eat the body of christ?
(wankymcwankwank Eels, tobacconists, hovercraft and bouncy bouncy., Fri 22 Oct 2010, 8:30, closed)

You dated a Vogon?
Did she spout shit poetry?
( Snappyuk gets BIGGER with free sample., Fri 22 Oct 2010, 9:01, closed)

You have my sympathy
I dated a girl who was great, apart from three things:

- she was a vegan (I'm not)
- she had very short hair (I have a thing for long hair)
- she didn't believe in planning - everything had to be spontaneous (I'm more controlled)

But hey, I loved her anyway. After a year it all went tits up, and we split up. Naturally, she immediately stopped being a vegan, grew her hair long, and changed her attitude to the point that she's now a professional planner / organiser!

Women, eh? Can't live with them, can't live with them.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 10:00, closed)

Can't live with them. (Move along)

( SigmaX0 Dear Die Hard. You rock!, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 10:54, closed)