Last year on holiday
Not our relationship....but....

Me and Ms. Dchurch went to Greece last year for a holiday.
At the start of the holiday there was a couple in the room next to us who quite frankly could not shut the fuck up. Constant rows. Constant shouting. In the end it was starting to piss me off, when an almighty row erupted which pretty much the whole hotel was privy to.
Apparently, the bloke in this relationship had an affair and this holiday was their way of trying to patch things up. The row got more and more violent, and louder and louder as they both tried to shout above each other.
Then, as quickly as the row started, it went silent.

The next night, the pair of them were at the bar in the hotel. One at one end, the other at the other end; the woman now sporting a massive shiner.

To be honest, it wouldn't have matter where these two went to 'patch up their relationship' it was long dead, and if you're going to argue that much, you have to ask yourselves if it's really worth trying surely?

True, she got on my tits with her melodramatic crap and hoarse screaming, but a belter to the eye?
(dchurch bah, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 20:46, 11 replies)

I totally agree
He should've punched her in the mouth.
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 20:52, closed)

and
the fanny, just for good measure.
(dchurch bah, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 20:52, closed)

Uppercunt!

(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 21:07, closed)

HA HA
Proper tea-spilling-onto-laptop-lols.

How would that work anyway? Wouldn't your fist get stuck?
( Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 22:04, closed)

These people need baffling...
...which is why I always take my sou'wester and large fake beard with me when I go to the Greek Islands.
(Chopsey, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 21:36, closed)

bruises
always beat the body, or in a fashion that doesn´t bruise. Top tips from the teacher...
(Neostenine's maker, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 21:41, closed)

a dozen oranges in a pillowcase.
top tip from "the grifters"...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 22 Oct 2010, 22:28, closed)

One of the scariest sequences in cinema history
and far more subtly violent than the ear bit in Reservoir Dogs.
( Sonic the Hedgetrimmer doesn't care what you think, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 16:59, closed)

The soles of the feet
No bruises neither, apparently.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 22 Oct 2010, 23:17, closed)

Did she
manage to pull one of the waiters?
(Blue_in_Exile, Sat 23 Oct 2010, 0:20, closed)

Here, here
She should've been smart enough to find a way to enjoy her holiday.
(ChiTown Guy Dating when 35+: sane, single, attractive - pick 2, Sat 23 Oct 2010, 1:03, closed)