Restaurants, Kitchens and Bars... Oh my!Many years ago, I went out with a chef. Kitchens are merely vice dens with food. You couldn't move for people bonking and snorting coke in the store room. And the things they did with the food...
My personal vice was chocolate mousse - I remember it being very calming in all the chaos around me. I think they put things in it.
Tell us your stories of working in kitchens, bars and the rest of the nightmare that is the catering trade.
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chthonic, Fri 21 Jul 2006, 9:58)
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BakingIt's related but not especially funny.
For five years I worked in a bakery in South Wales. A big one that provides most supermarkets with a lot of bread.
And what goes into that stuff is nobody's business. If a doughball comes of the belt and gets all mangled in the cogs, aint no thang. Just get your knife in there and chuck the oily dough back in.
So some dough went bad and stinks and is expanding all over the fucking place? No problem, just chuck an armful of this foul stuff in with every mix until it's gone.
Coughed something up that you'd rather not swallow? In it goes. No time to take a leak? I've seen it done, the bloke in question even pausing afterwards to adjust water levels in the mixer.
Hey, that low quality muck that even Aldi wouldn't accept for it's Spinaca brand bread? ( a while ago, like I say) Just put one in every dozen, and replace the date tags. Who would know?
And once that shit bread has been bought it will be taken in some cases to restaurants where it will be gobbed on, wanked over and violated in other ways before you eat it. Mmmm, good.
(, Wed 26 Jul 2006, 14:32, Reply)
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