drunken pole kissing.
My dad is fond of going out for his weekend bevvy with his friends, and getting quite smashed. Often this results in him taking a cab home and stumbling up the path for all the neighbors to see, mumbling to himself.

One night, as my mum and I were awaiting his triumphant return from his watering hole when we hear this dull thud outside. Mom rushes outside, to find my dad sitting on the porch, gathering change he had dropped, and blood gushing from a dented gash in his forehead.

"I think I hit my head," he slurred, picking up quarters.

Mom pulls him inside the house, and makes him hold towels to his head to stop the bleeding. It refuses to stop! I'm having a fit, and my dad is laughing about it. Then he sits on the couch and passes out, despite our efforts to keep him awake... how do you keep a drunken scotsman awake, even if he has a concussion?

When he came to in the morning, he had a very bad headache and told us the story of what happened. He had tripped into the flowerbed, and ran face first into the cement pole by the porch. After that, he fell into the bush by the door, and realized he dropped his change.

He still has a dent, was was picking cement debris out of his head for a week.

Apologies for length.
(megomobile, Tue 8 Feb 2005, 20:06, Reply)