such a relevant question
I live in the first floor flat. The only nice one in the 5-flat victorian terrace. The rest are a bit crap and attract weirdos.

Needless to say, in the basement there is a WIERD couple. Two blokes, american. One is geeky and scrawny with glasses, one looks like some mexican, short, george micheal. Every weekend, due to their patio being 2 stories down below my bedroom window, I get woken up at 7.30am by 'GM' having a screaming match at 'skinny fuck' about something. Once he was boasting about how his 'product' was 'natural' and 'real' and not 'for the masses' like 'nivea'. He then shuts his cat outside which miaows for THREE FUCKING HOURS.

Then when I set the fire alarm off (woks are great!) I got the skinny bloke coming and glaring at me whilst I reset the alarm

"is there a PROBLEM?"
"yeah.. cooking... smoke.. blah... "
"IS THERE A PROBLEM?"
"um... I was cooking?"
*glares at me*
"I WAS COOKING FOOD. IT SET OFF THE ALARM"
*glares*
"COOKING. I WAS COOKING"
*sighs and walks off*

And then moving a LOT of stuff into my flat (note: I've lived there 8 months more than these wierdos).... 'GM' comes out and raises his arms and screams ....

"IS THERE A PROBLEM?!"
"um. I don't believe so"
"IT SOUNDS LIKE A STAMPEDE OF ELEPHANTS" (I should have pointed out to him that the floor would not sustain an elephant's weight)
"well, I'm moving stuff"
"ITS BEEN LIKE THIS ALL WEEK, i HAVE A SICK NEPHEW DOWNSTAIRS"
"ok. well, I haven't been here all week, so it's not me. And I'm moving stuff, so it's going to be."
*sighs and stomps off*

And recently they wake me up at 7.30 AM EVERY talking out on their patio. Without fucking FAIL. They carry the weirdest shit into that flat. And never clean the patio and it looks disgusting. And they left rubbish in the public foyer. And they're cunts. And I hate them.

That is all.
( FinestLittleSpace, Thu 25 Aug 2005, 15:52, Reply)