SchadenfreudeThere's nothing like administering first aid to cyclist who has just spanged into the back of a milk float when you have tears of laughter running down your face. The world is just one long episode of You've Been Framed - when have you laughed at the misfortune of others?
Suggested by althechristmasgeordie
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 17 Dec 2009, 12:05)
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Self ejectionA mate of mine by the name of Beechy was down visiting us in Bournemouth for another mate's birthday. A good few drinks had been consumed at the resultant houseparty, and we resolved to head out into town to carry on drinking. Not that Beechy needed to. He was trollied, and despite usually being one of the nicest blokes you could ever wish to meet, was behaving like an utter twat. On our short walk to the club he downed what was left of his large bottle of JD (it had been full when he started) and randomly hurled it across the road - missing the head of another friend by inches. Once inside the club, he continued being a total obnoxious twat, entering a fancy dress contest (it was also Halloween) despite being dressed in just jeans and a shirt. Upon not winning, he sprayed the judges with beer, then threw the rest of his pint, still in the (thankfully plastic) container onto the dance floor, Begbie-style.
Don;t get me wrong, normally I love the bloke but we were definitely getting fucked off with his behaviour on this occasion, and the bouncers were about to move in. We decided that we weren't going to risk a shoeing on his behalf, and if they chucked him out, he was on his own - he was, after all, utterly in the wrong.
As the bouncers moved in, Beechy's attitude got even worse and he lit up a fag (this was post-smoking ban) and leaned back against the wall, waiting for the black-suited gorillas to come and get him. Only they didn't have to. Beechy was stood by a fire door, and as he leaned back, his arse hit the bar that opened it.
Del-boy style, he fell straight through the door without breaking his form, and te bouncers simply closed the door behind him, for the easiest club ejaculation they will ever have had to conduct.
Serves hims right, the tit.
(, Fri 18 Dec 2009, 16:58, 2 replies)
ClickSimply for "club ejaculation"!!!
(, Sat 19 Dec 2009, 12:23, closed)
Great stuff!(, Tue 22 Dec 2009, 15:23, closed)
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