So a little bit embarrasing...
I should't tell but I will.

Basically it was the day of school before parents evening (the worst nights of my life). Basically this involved all my teachers delightfully telling my mum what a wanker I was, thus home time and a few clips round the ear and so on. Anyway it was lunch when me and my mate Dave* decided to bunk off, it was a last minute thing and we had to discover the best tactic of sneaking out of school when everyone was gone. Anyway I needed the toilet only there wasn't any toilets only Scumpits. So off we went, we sneak off to the other playground round the sportshall and behind this really long and short wall. Anyway we had to squat down and be on the lookout. 15 minutes later i'm dying for a shit, I have to go. So I had to tell my mate to turn around I whip down my trousers have a shite, look in my bag for some A4 paper and I'm done. So we decide we have to move now coz I don't wanna get caught and being in trouble for having a shit behind a wall. So we start moving then just behind the gates theres the schoolfield and then Mrs Sainsburys class had just come on she sees us. THANK THE LORD i was quick, anyway we dart out of a broken fence and we both run different ways. Muggins here decides to run across around a Mile of field while my mate slips down the backway. So here I am running across the worst schoolfield in history, I run past the older schoollads playin football, Mr Twatface orders one of the lads to catch me. Oh Fuck im gonna get caught and there gonna know it was me who had a shit, No No No, well I'm caught up pretty fast but it was someone I knew he told me to bloody run as fast as I can and then i run and hide in this bush anyway I try find my way past this bush, when I see a garden and a pair of legs six feet away with a Fuckin Baseball bat, he calls for his dog, so I have to sprint all the way round whereever the hell I am, and run around the front of this guys house, I see him hitting the bush with his bat and run off in a direction which wasn't mine. Anyway I finally arrive home and mum doesnt Know anything yet, which is fine with me. Anyway I'm dreading school the rest of the afternoon/early evening we get there and nothing is said at all, all night. I've gotten away with it I thought then came along mrs Sainsburys, My head of Year I think oh fuck this is gonna be bad. but they just told my mum i was bunking. When I got home she shouted and stuff but was puzzled at why I had a little smirk on my face, i got a little slap for it but she doen't know to this day why??



Not so much funny as just plain eventful!
First post!



Names Changed
(imnotnormalami, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 1:55, 8 replies)

wow.....
....that was awful.
(bobman500 enjoys a grope as much as the next fella, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 2:35, closed)

That is all just one big blur... Paragraphs man!
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 7:14, closed)

Paragraphs and sentences.
The full stop is your friend. Don't rape him though.
( gareth_alien will be human again at, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 8:48, closed)

yes.
Paragraphs are your friend.

Other than that, quite an eventful tale!
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 7:56, closed)

Yes, paragraphs please.
And try not to start two consecutive sentences with "basically".
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 10:18, closed)

^ what they said
my eyes hurt
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 11:42, closed)

sorry guys
will do in future!
(imnotnormalami, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 13:28, closed)

Ow!!
Mein eyes!
(Burt Burt, Wed 4 Feb 2009, 16:25, closed)