Just when you thought it was safe
We went to the swimming pool every Friday for the ritual humiliation of bearing our bodies to classmates so we could be mocked for years afterwards about our fat / hair / birthmarks / no tits etc. But at the end of each term, we were allowed to mess about with snorkels and masks.

This provided a great opportunity to swim beneath Judy B in order to get a cod's eye view of her love mound. It also led to the situation where Adam S, a portly boy with freckles, had a dump in the pool.

The high fat and corn content in the said log caused it to bob heartily in his wake, causing the sadistic paedo swimming instructor to order everyone out of the pool to avert a hygiene scandal. And everyone fled the pool like that scene in Jaws - everyone except John K, who surfaced from the deep directly below the trident sub that was Adam's stool.

As we gasped, it narrowly missed his breathing tube. As we winced, it settled with amazing accuracy on the top of his mask, shelf-like.

Imagine how it must have seemed to him, surfacing to see his classmates screaming and pointing at him. Imagine the sensation as he slipped off the mask to ask "WHAT?!" ... and slicked the still warm turd back through his hair.

He used a whole bottle of shampoo later.
(frankspencer, Wed 13 Dec 2006, 13:46, Reply)