Sexism
Freddie Woo tells us: Despite being a well rounded modern man I think women are best off getting married and having a few kids else they'll be absolutely miserable come middle age.
What views do you have that are probably sexist that you believe are true?
( , Sun 27 Dec 2009, 12:23)
Freddie Woo tells us: Despite being a well rounded modern man I think women are best off getting married and having a few kids else they'll be absolutely miserable come middle age.
What views do you have that are probably sexist that you believe are true?
( , Sun 27 Dec 2009, 12:23)
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Stats
It's not that simple:
89% of recorded domestic violence victims are female. Looking more closely at the information that's available, females are more likely to suffer repeated attacks over a period of time.
Is it really true that one man per week in the UK dies as a result of domestic abuse?
The original question was "Does that mean that males must accept what women consider abuse? Why?
In our so called advanced society, why am I not afforded the same rights as the vagina owners club?" which I answered - Males do *not* have to accept any form of abuse, and in our advanced Western society, men and women have the same rights.
In answer to your question - In my experience, domestic violence against men is not ignored or treated as if it didn't exist. There was a campaign in the North East (by the police I think) encouraging men to report incidents of domestic violence and get support from local agencies. I think any kind of disrespectful treatment can be hugely damaging depending on the person and the situation. Not forgetting ,of course, that DV causes problems in same-sex relationships too, for men and women.
At no point did I say that I personally think that DV against men doesn't exist or should be ignored (in fact, I think DV against men is probably HUGELY under-reported). Sadly, I have witnessed very closely the sadness destruction it can cause for people. What I did say is that the proportion of women seeking support versus the proportion of males seeking support results in DV groups and agencies being predominantly for women as the respond to demand.
( , Fri 1 Jan 2010, 18:13, 1 reply)
It's not that simple:
89% of recorded domestic violence victims are female. Looking more closely at the information that's available, females are more likely to suffer repeated attacks over a period of time.
Is it really true that one man per week in the UK dies as a result of domestic abuse?
The original question was "Does that mean that males must accept what women consider abuse? Why?
In our so called advanced society, why am I not afforded the same rights as the vagina owners club?" which I answered - Males do *not* have to accept any form of abuse, and in our advanced Western society, men and women have the same rights.
In answer to your question - In my experience, domestic violence against men is not ignored or treated as if it didn't exist. There was a campaign in the North East (by the police I think) encouraging men to report incidents of domestic violence and get support from local agencies. I think any kind of disrespectful treatment can be hugely damaging depending on the person and the situation. Not forgetting ,of course, that DV causes problems in same-sex relationships too, for men and women.
At no point did I say that I personally think that DV against men doesn't exist or should be ignored (in fact, I think DV against men is probably HUGELY under-reported). Sadly, I have witnessed very closely the sadness destruction it can cause for people. What I did say is that the proportion of women seeking support versus the proportion of males seeking support results in DV groups and agencies being predominantly for women as the respond to demand.
( , Fri 1 Jan 2010, 18:13, 1 reply)
I don't know
the depth of your involvement in such issues, but I have had more or less continuous involvement with the Family Law Court (and many other men I know eperience similar). The problem being that, legally we are equals, yet reality is entirely different. I have been accused of the most horrific things by my ex-partner, which are all taken very seriously by the courts, police and Family Services, and helped along by the vast numbers of womens help groups (I get the impression that they, just want to be seen to be helping, without actually checking their facts), yet as a male in this system, I can tell you that it is all very discriminatory, the cops do not care that you may be innocent, the magistrates follow the cops, and Family Services pander non stop to the "poor mother". For the last 16 years I have seen accusations and rulings that I would have never believed possible in today's society.
I don't hate women, I know it may appear that way, but I am appalled at the inequalities that I have witnessed personally, disgusted with the indifference of those who stand by and watch, refusing involvement.I particularly despise those who would stand and say that such women (the ones I have dealt with)are discriminated against and have no fault. These are the people (men and women) that destroy equality, by assuming that one is more innocent than the other.
I don't know how it is in th UK but this is how it is here. To be an employed caucasian Australian Male, put's you right at the bottom of the heap. As for 89% of recorded DV "victims" being female, you can probably adjust that to around 20-30% of actual harm (in Australia), as the first stop for women separating here is to get a DVO which will prevent a man from seeing his kids and removes him from the house, usually the one he's paying for. All of which sets the precedent for the courts, who will decide that because this has been the status quo for the last 3 years (don't worry that is has taken that long to reach a hearing) that will be how it's going to be forever. Because keeping dad away from the kids means more child support and more welfare benefits, it is extremely beneficial for mum to keep him away regardless of the lies that must be told, and there is no shortage of departments full of people who rely on these women to ensure that they have a job to go to, so that they can have somewhere to live and food to eat.
( , Wed 6 Jan 2010, 12:52, closed)
the depth of your involvement in such issues, but I have had more or less continuous involvement with the Family Law Court (and many other men I know eperience similar). The problem being that, legally we are equals, yet reality is entirely different. I have been accused of the most horrific things by my ex-partner, which are all taken very seriously by the courts, police and Family Services, and helped along by the vast numbers of womens help groups (I get the impression that they, just want to be seen to be helping, without actually checking their facts), yet as a male in this system, I can tell you that it is all very discriminatory, the cops do not care that you may be innocent, the magistrates follow the cops, and Family Services pander non stop to the "poor mother". For the last 16 years I have seen accusations and rulings that I would have never believed possible in today's society.
I don't hate women, I know it may appear that way, but I am appalled at the inequalities that I have witnessed personally, disgusted with the indifference of those who stand by and watch, refusing involvement.I particularly despise those who would stand and say that such women (the ones I have dealt with)are discriminated against and have no fault. These are the people (men and women) that destroy equality, by assuming that one is more innocent than the other.
I don't know how it is in th UK but this is how it is here. To be an employed caucasian Australian Male, put's you right at the bottom of the heap. As for 89% of recorded DV "victims" being female, you can probably adjust that to around 20-30% of actual harm (in Australia), as the first stop for women separating here is to get a DVO which will prevent a man from seeing his kids and removes him from the house, usually the one he's paying for. All of which sets the precedent for the courts, who will decide that because this has been the status quo for the last 3 years (don't worry that is has taken that long to reach a hearing) that will be how it's going to be forever. Because keeping dad away from the kids means more child support and more welfare benefits, it is extremely beneficial for mum to keep him away regardless of the lies that must be told, and there is no shortage of departments full of people who rely on these women to ensure that they have a job to go to, so that they can have somewhere to live and food to eat.
( , Wed 6 Jan 2010, 12:52, closed)
But...
We're not talking about women who make false accusations, we're talking about actual domestic violence. The fact it is hard to prove, and the nature of it, makes it more difficult for everyone - women, men, workers and the justice system...
I'm really sorry to hear about your bad experience and understand how it is difficult for you to remain objective about it. There may be many men in your position, but there are also many women who are unable to prosecute their abusers due to similar flaws in the legal system.
( , Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:19, closed)
We're not talking about women who make false accusations, we're talking about actual domestic violence. The fact it is hard to prove, and the nature of it, makes it more difficult for everyone - women, men, workers and the justice system...
I'm really sorry to hear about your bad experience and understand how it is difficult for you to remain objective about it. There may be many men in your position, but there are also many women who are unable to prosecute their abusers due to similar flaws in the legal system.
( , Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:19, closed)
Exactly
When there are so many false accusations, it just makes it more difficult for those who are genuinely harmed.
Accusation of violence is a common tool for women involved in family law proceedings, yet there is no punishment for those who caught out perjuring themselves, hence there is no justice for those falsely accused, your name and face forever dirtied.
( , Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:37, closed)
When there are so many false accusations, it just makes it more difficult for those who are genuinely harmed.
Accusation of violence is a common tool for women involved in family law proceedings, yet there is no punishment for those who caught out perjuring themselves, hence there is no justice for those falsely accused, your name and face forever dirtied.
( , Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:37, closed)
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