Waterfall
1980, School Assembly. The Captain realises after 10 minutes that he needs to micturate. No problems, assembly normally only lasts 15 minutes and I can wait. 10 minutes further on and I start to worry. The Headmaster is on his high horse about something and the assembly lasted 35 fecking minutes! By the time all pupils were asked to leave and go to their classrooms, I was sat in a puddle of lukewarm slash. Kids round me were sniffing and asking 'what's that smell?'. I was on the verge of tears, but as my class remained seated and our teacher started talking a glimmer of hope emerged. I would ask to go to the toilet, and dry my trousers on the hand driers. Genius! I asked to go to the toilet..
The entire bloody class watched me as I got up and walked out. Knowing that my trousers were wet with pee, I had to walk out backwards... watched by 30 juniors. (FFS why did I have to have an audience?) It was like a scene from the worst week of my life when, in the boys toilet, my teacher walked in with a pair of trousers from the dressing up box. (cringe).
These were not even inconspicuous ones, they were black victorian Soldier ones with Thick red strips down the sides.
I never lived the shame down. My Mum was confused as to why I was wearing soldier trousers, and I had to tell her in front of a small group of my peers that I had wet myself.
Tell you what though, from that moment until I left that school 4 years later, I always went to the loo before Assembly, whether I needed to or not.
(LunarJim, Fri 25 Nov 2005, 9:19, Reply)