Recycling the same old shit, part one
If Humpty, Legless et al can do this then so can I...

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It's October 2001, and I'm in Thailand with the ex. Phuket, to be precise, part of a 3 week tour of the far east.

Having booked a day's scuba diving, an early-ish night is on the cards, as the dive company are picking me up at 7am. So we decide to have a romantic meal at the hotel and retire early.

"Ooh, that sounds nice, I'll have that" says I, and orders what sounded like heaven. Baked sea-bass, done with ginger, lime and garlic.

And, it transpired, chili, which wasn't mentioned on the menu. It was so fucking hot it stripped the skin from my lips. Hmm. Scuba diving in sea water, with no skin on my lips. A little like a sub-aqua Mason Verger, if you like.

That wasn't the worst of my problems though. As is sometimes the case when I have spicy food (which I do love), the next morning my stomach was doubled up with cramps and the first thing I have to do is go and lose a bit of weight. Fine and dandy, I thought.

Oh no. This continued on the dive boat, with its primitive toilet facilities - a very basic toilet with a pump action flush mechanism. Trying to get rid of what seemed like several tons of barely-reconstituted sea bass was no easy task, but somehow I managed.

And then came the dive. So there I am, with salt water stinging my lips in the Andaman Sea, with 20 metres of water above me compressing my insides to buggery, and still with what felt like a whole fucking fish working it's way remorslesley through my intestinal tract. Having a piss in a wetsuit is one thing, this was an entirely different ball game...

I don't eat spicy food before a dive now. Lesson learned.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 31 Mar 2008, 12:43, 2 replies)

It's compulsory.
You MUST re-cycle!! Its good for the environment. (and any up and coming book etc)

;o)
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Mon 31 Mar 2008, 12:50, closed)

click
maybe your fishy dinner wanted to return to the big deep blue, love the hannibal reference!
(maxumus HEY!.... diddly dee, de de de de de de, Mon 31 Mar 2008, 15:20, closed)