I wish I could remember more of these
I've always been very close to LittleSisterCrow - certainly it surprised me that most of my friends didn't get on with their siblings. So obviously, I have tried to be understanding and behave myself when she asks that I do not let on to her friends that her nickname amongst the family is "Moose."

She does, however, have a peculiar and scatological outlook on life, (which I have been told is similar to mine...should I have been offended by that?) which has led her to come out with some rather 'special' little quotes. Sadly many of them escape me right now, but I shall tack them on to the end of this post if I remember more:

"Do bears eat trees?"

"So was Jesus...a Jew?"

And upon hearing that my housemate had borked his leg:
Moose: "So has he got a wheelchair?"
Me: "No, he's on crutches. Wheelchairs cost a small fortune"
Moose: "Can't you make him one?"
Me: "Make him one?"
Moose: "Yeah. Make him one. Out of physics."

More to come when I remember them. If anyone cares, that is.

Update: Just remembered a recent one. She commented that the gas bill in her student flat was surprisingly high one quarter:
Moose: "We're just surprised, 'cause we haven't had the heating on, and the oven's electric."
Me: "What about the hot water?"
Moose: "Does that use gas as well?"
Me: "Yes, it comes from the same boiler as your heating."
Moose: "Oh..."
Me: "Where did you think it came from?"
Moose: "...water company...."
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 13:56, 9 replies)

*cares*
u bring "teh funneh"
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 14:08, closed)

Aw, baz
You are too kind, sir.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 14:14, closed)

my kindness aint cheap!
You done best bring "teh funneh"! :)
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 14:29, closed)

burn witch
Both of your outlooks on life are shaped by the study of faeces? Admit it, you're a gypsy hedge witch.
(Asser, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 14:30, closed)

(Dr)
Gillian McKeith?
(kebabking - salad and garlic mayo pls, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 16:03, closed)

"Make him one. Out of physics."
That's going into my vocabulary...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 14:56, closed)

One of the best we've had on this one
More please
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 16:55, closed)

"...water company...."
Lol. **clicks**
(Biff..., Mon 5 Jan 2009, 18:49, closed)

Sounds like my friend Kate
When she was renting through the real estate I work for I had some alarming conversations with her.

This was probably my favourite.


"You have to call the outside real estate thingy and tell them it's fallen down."

This baffling statement kind of floored me. It took me probably 20 mins to figure it out. What she meant was that the electricity lines came away from the power pole in the front yard and I needed to call the electricity company.
(misskitty reeks of sex and turpentine; laudanum afternoons, Tue 6 Jan 2009, 2:19, closed)