Here's a long one, not very sick, but time consuming to say the least.
Bob the bus driver loved Sesame Street so much that one day he decided to paint all the characters, Elmo, Big Bird, Oscar, Cookie Monster, etc. on the side of his bus. He drove around proudly on his route, as people admired the bus from afar.

At his first stop, two enormously fat women stepped onto the bus and introduced themselves as the twin sisters, Pattie and Patty. They began to chat among themselves in annoyingly high-pitched voices, but Bob simply ignored them and continued on his way.

The next stop was outside a school, where a lone boy wearing a helmet and a bowtie entered the bus. He introduced himself as Paul, but added that everyone called him Special Paul because he was a "special" person. Paul sat across from the fat sisters and kept to himself.

As the bus rolled into the slum area of the city, it stopped outside a broken down apartment building, where a crude-looking young man wearing a leather jacket and sporting a mohawk stepped on. He suddenly let out an enormous sneeze, patted Bob on the back, and introduced himself as Lester Sneeze. A nickname he recieved due to his frequent colds.

About half an hour into the ride, Bob heard whines coming from the back of the bus. It turns out Lester had whipped out his pocket knife and begun to cut bunions from his feet and flick them at poor Paul's head. Pattie and Patty were both screaming at him to stop bothering the poor child, and the entire bus was in an uproar.

Finally, Bob couldn't take it anymore. He stopped the bus, picked up the nearest payphone and made a call.

"Hello, Department of Transportation? I need help! I've got two all beef Patties, Special Paul, and Lester Sneeze flickin' bunions on a Sesame Street bus!"
( Digeridude Lord Wellington's Beef Trapeze, Fri 10 Sep 2004, 8:44, Reply)