A Few
What's Red and can't turn round in a corridor? A baby with a javelin through it's head.

Did you hear..... a woman with no legs won the UK strawberry picking contest............. What a Jammy cunt.......

Why did the pervert cross the road? Cos he couldn't get his cock out of the chicken.

What do you get if you cross the Atlantic with the titanic? Halfway.

Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss after using them.

A dustman is going along a street picking up the wheelie bins and emptying them into his dustcart lorry. He gets to one house where the bin hasn't been left out so he has a quick look for it (unusual I know), goes round the back but still can't see it so he knocks on the door. There's no answer so he knocks again. Eventually a Japanese bloke answers... "Harro", says the jappy chappy. "Alright mate. Where's your bin?" asks the dustman. "I bin on toilet" replies the Japanese bloke, looking perplexed. Realizing the Japanese fellow has misunderstood, the bin-man smiles and says "No mate, where's ya dust bin?". "I dust bin on toilet I told you" says the Japanese man. "Mate" says the dustman... "you're misunderstanding me... Where's your Wheelie Bin?" "OK" "OK" , says the Jap, "I wheelie bin having wank"
(Mischeivious_Delinquent_Squirrel, Fri 10 Sep 2004, 9:08, Reply)