A few jokes:
Why do women have two holes so close together? So you can carry them home like a six-pack.

How do you tell if a woman is wearing tights?
When she farts, her ankles swell.

Did you hear about the man who owned a dog with no legs?
He called it cigarette, because every night he'd take it out for a drag.


Little Johnny comes home from school and asks his mother "Mummy, where do I come from?"
Not wanting to teach her son a pack of lies, she takes off all her clothes and shows him.
"Thanks Christ for that," says little Johnny, "another inch and I'd have been a turd."
(Wrecked Tums, Fri 10 Sep 2004, 14:38, Reply)