Hmm
I'm a drunk smoker - Well, sortof.

At university I used to be able to drink plenty and then light up and smoke away. The next morning, I would be fine and not wanting a sober smoke.

However, as the years have gone on, my smoking tolerance has gone down - I still don't want one sober though although I do get the occasional craving...

My most recent experience, however, was not very nice...

I was pretty full of red wine and I decided, in my ifinite wisdom, to have a smoke so I bummed one and lit up. Took a big drag. Ahhhh, nice....

Not.

I got a nicotine rush which made my head swim, my body sway and my eyes go all crossed - I put my hand on **that** post to steady myself, except the post had mysteriously vanished and there was just air - I fell forwards and aimed for **that** bench there, which lept out of my way - my senses failed at this point and my brain slowed time down and decided that there was going to be pain.

And I was duly rewarded as falling head met solid bench (which had put itself back in my way) - fortunately I was wearing my "shield of beer" and didn't feel pain.

As I lay there I was faintly aware of a rancid smell - the cigarette, tauntingly, was right by my face - just **there**.

As I lay there, face down on the pavement, breathing in the smoke, I decided that perhaps, just perhaps, smoking wasn't for me...
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 16:22, 4 replies)

"Shield of beer"
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

*Click*
(BrainSurgerysFun, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 19:59, closed)

True
It's true - get drunk and fall down - you will **not** get hurt.

Case & point - I got hammered one night with my uncle and tried opening some bottles on the edge of a table with my hand - you know - balance beer on table, hit bottle.... It didn't work and it was several attempts later when I realised that I was balancing the bottle on it's neck and **not** the top - no pain at all...

The next day, my cruel uncle shook and squeezed my hand, knowing full well what I'd done the night before... Oh the pain... He laughed. A lot...
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 23:23, closed)

*click*
For 'shield of beer.'
That one's new to me - although I have been the victim of 'beer goggles' several times over the years.....

*shakes head and thanks fate for Davros' Granddad being easier on the eye than I'd remembered when meeting him sober for our first date*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 21 Mar 2008, 13:24, closed)

Nice one
The shield of beer has come in handy on many an occasion...

As for beer goggles - thank fuck mine were working OK that night as well *chuckle*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 21 Mar 2008, 14:03, closed)