Mad football players!
A friend of mine told me quite a few stories from when he was in college in Buffalo in the late 70s. Pat was about 5' 6", but was such a maniac about weight lifting that you never realized it until you got right up to him- he was extremely muscular and carried himself well. He was also an incredibly fast runner, so he was on the University of Buffalo football team as a corner back.

On their way to the bars, he and his teammates used to pass by the Security building. One night one of the guys noticed that the sign for the Security office was a sheet of plywood mounted on a pair of posts at either end, so he ran like hell and leaped feet first at it. Splintered plywood flew everywhere, and they laughed as they legged it out of there.

The following week a new sign was made and installed, and again the guy launched himself through it. The same performance occurred the following week as well.

The week after that they saw the nice brand-new sign, and his teammates dared him to break that one as well. The guy let out a mighty scream and ran at it full tilt, flying feet first through the air.

You know how Wile E. Coyote runs face first into something and then just kinda drops?...

SPANG! *thud*

They had replaced it with a rather thick sheet of aluminum.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 1 Nov 2007, 18:41, 2 replies)

Just have to say...
Tee Hee Hee
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 2 Nov 2007, 8:50, closed)

Re: SPANG! *thud*
One night after a feed or two of drink, we were wandering the empty city streets bored and in need of entertainment.

One of our group, a weedy, needy, eager-to-please eejit called Pat was bullied into donning a paper bag on his head with no eyeholes.

We then amused ourselves by kicking him up the arse and slapping him round the head until, getting pissed off with our antics, he made a run for it.

It probably would have been for the best if he'd removed the paper bag first. But, he didn't, ran around the pavement like a headless chicken before SPANG! into a lamp post. It was like in a cartoon as, with an arm and a leg outstretched on either side of the pole, he slid to the ground and lay quite still.

After several minutes of rolling about on the ground, crying with laughter, we went over to check on him. Apart from a lump the size of a hen's egg on his forehead and being forever the object of our derision, he was fine.
(Fanta Menace Is tall enough to see over the fence, Fri 2 Nov 2007, 10:35, closed)