The ex tactless wife
Not because she isn't tactless anymore but because, you know, it's like her middle name, geddit?

A few years ago, a friend came to visit us, looking for a cup of tea and some sympathy and a sofa to kip on for a week or two whilst he sorted a few things out. With a pained expression, he recounted how he was splitting up from his lovely wife. He could barely string words into sentences he was so distraught and confused. He couldn't imagine how he'd go on living without her, the love of his life, and even his step-daughter who he had always loved as if she were his own, and especially his son, LesJr., who was barely two at the time.
So my (now ex) wife reassured him with such kind words as:
"Oh, of course you can stay as long as you wish whilst you sort this awful mess out."
"Is there anything we can help you with? Do you need a loan? Has that awful money-grabbing bitch cleaned you out?"
"Oh well, Les, now you can move on with your life and find someone who really loves you for who you are, not just your money."
"Bacon, will you stop kicking my shins"
"At least you won't have to pay that cheating bitch a penny in child support, since LesJr. isn't yours anyway."
"Bacon, you're going to break my ankle if you carry on like that."
( wakeupandsmellthebacon, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 10:47, Reply)