Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
(
Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
« Go Back
I love my mum!Back in the seventies I was pulled over by the police on the M4 and escorted home... after being found driving a go-kart bought by my father and encouraged to play with on the road by my mother because "the pathway was too small". I was five years old at the time.
My mother bought my older brother a second-hand bicycle which had no seat on it, no brakes and a flat tyre (My father told her that it was too dangerous but she always got her own way). She then asked my brother to go up to the shop to get some bread... He came back with a broken nose and a missing tooth.
My mother is fitting into the role of "grandmother" very well, she's already tried to suffocate my baby niece by sticking a plastic bag over her face (her excuse was she had just left it there for a minute whilst she sorted out the rest of her shopping bags... which obviously was much more important than her grand-daughter's need for oxygen). My sons are presented every birthday/christmas with toys that make Mattel look like the pioneers of child safety (I'm just waiting for a box of Lidl steak knives with detachable handles).
My mother also enjoys walking my eldest son into bollards and lamp posts whilst pushing my youngest son (in his pushchair) into the path of on comming traffic - hence why I don't let her near my kids anymore.
Mums like this are one in a million... thankfully.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 10:48, Reply)
« Go Back