Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
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Several things:1. I was petrified of losing teeth so I would let them go naturally...literally waiting till they were hanging by a visible root. So gross. Anyway, my mom was cleverer than I and told me she was going to help me brush my teeth one night. She brushed so vigorously that she knocked out one of my loose teeth.
2. I wrote secret love letters to Peter Pan and left them on my window sill. I got replies...in my Mom's handwriting.
5. I had a bad habit of sucking on chunks of my hair. My mom put tabasco sauce on it to get me to stop.
4. When I was too young to um...take care of wiping myself after my number two's, I had this system of alerting my mom when I was ready for her to help me. After doing my business, I would open the door (within arm's reach) and clap loudly till she heard me. One time, a guest arrived while I was busy in the bathroom. I didn't know, so when I got to clapping...my mom never came. I had to take care of things myself that time. :(
And that's when I finally gained a sense of independence (while pooping).
(, Sun 19 Aug 2007, 5:45, Reply)
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