Terrible ParentingMy parents used to lock my brother, sister and I in the car while they went to the pub for a "quick one" after work. This quick one might last several hours, during which they would send bottles of Indian Tonic Water to us by way of refreshment.
On one particularly cold evening, bored stupid, we lit a small bonfire on the back seat of the car using the cigarette lighter and the contents of the glove box. We owe our lives to passing winos. (BTW: Please no more Maddie or Jesus gags, they've been done.)
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 16 Aug 2007, 9:47)
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My Dad's a CuntFor many reasons, but one memory in particular sticks in the mind.
When I was 11 or 12, I had recently discovered the joys of the web, namely filthy pornsites. I would spend frequent hours on my Dad's computer familiarising myself with the female anatomy. Unfortunately, at that age I was unaware that he could simply check the history to see what I had been up to.
Which he did. Then he thrashed me. Hard. But that ain't the worst part...
My Gran had been taken ill with cancer at the time, so we went up to Monklands hospital in Glasgow to visit her. All the way up there he was doing his usual - berating me, making me feel small, chipping away at my self-esteem. We arrive at the hospital, find her ward, and approach the bed, which is surrounded by my aunts, uncles, and many cousins. My Uncle William asks me how I'm doing, and then my Dad announces, in his loudest voice, that I had mainly been looking at hardcore porn sites on the internet. In front of my dying Gran!
Cheers Dad.
(, Tue 21 Aug 2007, 1:36, Reply)
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