My bath
is the only thing I really care about. I suppose it's because I like being naked and wet.

I bet it would be really hard to save from a fire though, what with it being connected to the house with pipes and fused to the floor and two walls and being too heavy for me to actually lift if I DID manage to disconnect it...

I suppose I could always buy a new one though.

Or just strip in the rain...
( Mellicious is made of candy, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:03, 17 replies)

Filthy!
Im off for a wank!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:09, closed)

Sit in the bath...
and survive the fire. Easy.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:13, closed)

@enzyme
do you not run the risk of being poached?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:19, closed)

Good point.
I am a nincompoop sometimes...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:22, closed)

not to worry
there are probably a number of B3TApedants working out how long it would take to poach a human being in a bath and if a burning house could generate and sustain sufficient heat - right now!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:41, closed)

*stops worrying*

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:46, closed)

Well, going on
The "generic bathtub capacity", and taking the specific heat capacity of water...

*calculates*

Human meats are damaged by temperatures in excess of 60 degrees C...

*counts on fingers*

Average house fire burns at...

Ok.

You'd have 23 mins, 14 seconds, in a full bathtub.
( Cawl, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:57, closed)

*BUT*
You'd actually die before that, from smoke inhalation, or drowning.

*raises glass*
Here's to dental records eh?
( Cawl, Fri 9 May 2008, 14:59, closed)

so you definitely would NOT
die of poaching then?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 9 May 2008, 15:08, closed)

In short,
You definitely would NOT.

The finished product might be more like heavily smoked pork.
( Cawl, Fri 9 May 2008, 15:10, closed)

I slouch corrected
Enzyme sir, my apologies.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 9 May 2008, 15:11, closed)

*climbs back into bath*

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 9 May 2008, 15:18, closed)

Hmm...
What if you had SCUBA gear with you in your tub, so that you could stay completely submerged? I imagine that the warming of the water would increase the rate of air consumption somewhat, though.

And, how long does the average total-loss house fire burn, I wonder?
(chase, Fri 9 May 2008, 16:40, closed)

You wouldn't need expensive scuba gear...
Just pull the plug out, quickly clamp your mouth around it then breathe through the overflow like a snorkel.
(Dok Zombie Cash, gash, pie and mash., Fri 9 May 2008, 16:56, closed)

Why not
run an extractor fan from next to the bath to suck the smoke out

that way you avoid the smoke inhalation and can happily poach away
(magic the cat will someone please think of the kittens, Fri 9 May 2008, 17:15, closed)

this thread
ought to be brought to the attention of the fire prevention and survival authorities.

B3TA - saves lives!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 9 May 2008, 17:53, closed)

You all seem to be forgetting
that the house is still burning down...
The floorboards would probably give way and you'd fall to your doom OR the roof would collapse and squish you!
( Mellicious is made of candy, Sat 10 May 2008, 11:07, closed)