So your interesting, original
story that you haven't written using a stolen username is?
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 8:39, 1 reply)

Try this, first write your story in as few words as possible
"A good friend of mine split up with his girlfriend and got a bit hacked off with me when I hinted to her that he may have someone else"

Read it a few times. Realise that there's really nothing interesting, amusing, shocking, or in any other way entertaining or diverting about this tale and try and come up with something better.

not

Wrap it in a fucktonne of inconsequentials mainly about smoking dope and drinking beer....again....
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 8:57, closed)

yeah ... good luck with this
he's had fifty odd years of being a tedious autism
(alright alright, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 8:59, closed)

40 odd.
Google it.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 9:34, closed)

Again
from the man who has posted a number of posts using my old [stolen] username. As AB would ask -
Your story is?
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 9:21, closed)

OK. By coincidence I have a mate called Gav!
I'd met him when I was driving a truck and he worked on the loading dock for one of my regular stops. A friendship blossomed and every couple of Fridays we'd meet at the pub, get stoned and then steadily drunk and more vociferous. He moved into a house across the road and we'd see each other most days. I'd bring the weed, he'd bring the booze and we'd get like really drunk and stoned, and then we'd drink and smoke more and more. And then more and more. Gav was a real mate. Sometimes I'd get bit depressed that despite every advantage in life, and a public school education I'd drifted from one unskilled low paid job to the next. I couldn't understand why this was happening to me. Luckily I always had Gav to see every morning and evening, cold beer in his hand a spliff ready rolled. As often happens when one is smoking lots of weed, I mean a really prodigious amounts, and drinking beer too, let's not forget all the beer, we'd sometimes get the munchies. One evening we had a packet of jammie dodgers on the coffee table, and while we were smoking spliffs and drinking beer, absolute shitloads of beer, we'd take a biscuits from the packet and eat them. I'd take a biscuit from the packet on the coffee table and eat it, then Gav would take a biscuit and eat it, then I'd take a biscuit from the packet and eat it. We were taking turns, he'd have a biscuit and then I'd have one. It wasn't a rule or anything. We hadn't discussed how we'd allocate the biscuits, we were just such good friends that we naturally shared them equally. Because of all the beer we'd been drinking all day Gav had to go and take a piss. It was my turn to take a biscuit from the packet and eat it, so I took a biscuit from the packet and ate it. Then I noticed something. There was one biscuit left. I knew that by rights it was Gav's turn to take a biscuit from the packet and eat it, but I took it and ate it before he returned from the bog. Not sure if he noticed or not, He didn't say anything, so probably not.
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 10:11, closed)

Lol
wut?
As AB has said to me on more than 1 occasion.

Since you stole my username and you're acting like a cunt, maybe you need to be on my ignore list.

Cheers, mate.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 10:19, closed)

Cunt? CUNT!?
I take the mick out of your story telling technique and you start dropping the C bomb on me? I'm appalled.
(ringofyre, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 17:22, closed)

But I'm willing to forgive you. It can't be easy.

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Sat 21 Sep 2013, 17:41, closed)

Hahaha

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 14:04, closed)

You're quite good at this.
If this were a transferable skill I'd probably offer you a job or sutin.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 14:11, closed)

Don't judge my skills by what I post here
I can also nearly get a billiard ball in my mouth and juggle up to two objects. I await your offer with interest.
(ringofyre, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 17:16, closed)

When can you start?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 18:49, closed)

This is marvellous.

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sat 21 Sep 2013, 14:55, closed)