The Exorcist
This MUST be a pea-roast but...

When I was 14, I had a dental operation. In hospital, general anaesthetic, the whole nine yards, just to put a crooked tooth straight.

I came to feeling absolutely awful, my mouth full of a boxer's gumshield glued to my teeth. It made it rather difficult to speak, but I tried:

"Mm muh urs" (My mouth hurts)

"Wan nk" (Not what you think - I want a drink)

and

"Anna e uk" (Want to be sick)

In fact, I wanted to be sick quite a lot, but nobody would listen to my random grunts. So I was sick anyway.

And because I'd bee out cold on my back while some surgeon hacked away at my mouth, I had ingested blood.

Quite a lot of blood.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARCH!"

Yeah, just like in The Exorcist.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARCH!"

"Get him a sick bucket!"

They tried to get me a sick bucket, but to no avail.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARCH!"

All over the nurse, the bed, and an impressive distance across the floor.

The nurse screamed, covered in blood like a murder victim.

Porters came running, but they might as well have sent the Chuckle Brothers, as the slipped in the bloody puke, and both went down like sacks of shit.

The nurse (think Barbara Windsor if it helps) went over on top of them, and they eventually managed to escape the scene of the carnage on all fours.

TA-DAAAA!

Not, it must be said, my finest moment.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 22:32, 5 replies)

Not your finest moment?
Sir! I beg to differ!!
( difficultchild, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 23:00, closed)

^Very much this
A finer moment would be hard to comprehend
( TheMattInAHat has a particular... odour..., Thu 7 Jan 2010, 23:02, closed)

Absolutely
Vomiting up blood for the win (and a cheeky Chuckle Brothers reference to boot)..
(anvil, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 23:46, closed)

Clickle Brothers!
*nod*
(harrumph, Fri 8 Jan 2010, 18:44, closed)

Needs more hedges...
But have a click anyhoo...
( snee held his breath since, Mon 11 Jan 2010, 11:13, closed)