camping
On a camping trip with my mate Neil, we ended up sharing a tent with a double inflatable mattress - separate sleeping bags, we're not benders.

One night, Neil pulls in the (very) locals pub, and I fuck off back to the tent. Just as i'm falling asleep, the tent opens and Neil sticks his head in - 'listen mate, we havent got anywhere to go, do you...erm... mind...?' - i roll over, stick my earphones in and curl up into my sleeping bag and brace myself.

After 10 mins of being kicked a lot, I am now very firmly bumping up and down, exactly 180 degrees out of phase with the humping couple next to me. Its absolutely pitch black and its rather weird, especially as all i can hear is master of puppets by metallica.

The humping pauses and I change album. Suddenly, theres a tapping on my head, getting more frantic. I take out an earphone, its Neil, whispering urgently - "look! look at this! look down!".

In the pitch darkness all i can see is an illuminous green bangle moving up and down quite rapidly. After a few seconds and my eyes adjust, i can just also make out a slightly green hand and a slightly green cock, lit dimly by the bangle. It was quite an impressive sight. Not the cock, which was like a normal cock, only smaller.

I went back to sleep.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Wed 17 Oct 2007, 13:32, 2 replies)

you can never tell
that you studied a science seriously at one point
(KaiserPro captain arse rape, Wed 17 Oct 2007, 15:16, closed)

Surely
you could plot out the oscillations as a mathematical equation?
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Wed 17 Oct 2007, 19:37, closed)