WeddingsAttending a wedding is like being handed a licence to act like a twat. Oh how I laughed when I sobered up and realised I'd nicked most of the plates and cutlery from the posh hotel lunch and those vague memories of stealthily exiting like a cat-burglar had in-fact involved falling out of the hotel, knives and forks clattering onto the steps.
Tell us your wedding stories.
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chthonic, Thu 14 Jul 2005, 15:19)
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Well, the drinks were already paid for...My brother told me this. Decide for yourself whether it's true.
My brother's friend (yes, it's one of those stories)went to the posh wedding of a mutual friend. The ceremony was very nice. Not even a snigger at the "If anyone has any reason why these two should not be wed..."
At the reception they went through the usual speeches. You know: Toast to the bride's parents, parents reply, toast to the groom's parents, parents reply etc. There was lot's of the usual "Thank you Aunty mary for arranging the lovely wedding cake. Thank you Tina and Cathy for being such lovely flower girls etc." Until it came time for the the Bridesmaids toast. The best man toasted the bridesmaids in the usual way "Thank you girls for supporting the bride in this stressful time, helping her organise everything, etc.". The groom stood up to reply on the behalf of the Bridemaids and to make his own toast.
"Thank you very much to my new in-laws who have welcomed me into their family so warmly.", he said. "Thank you to my parents who have welcomed XXX (can't remember bride's name into our family and who have done so much to support me and my new wife in the past. Thank you so much to Auntie Wendy for (whatever)..." Until he capped it off with "And last of all, thank you so much to my best man for being such a great friend all my life. A good friend, a good laugh, always happy to help out - we had a wonderful time growing up together. But most af all, thank you for fucking my bride last night!". At which point he sat down.
The room was silent. The best man was stunned. The bride burst into tears and ran from the room, followed by closely her family and then by the best man. The groom settled into a night of heavy drinking. He was heard to say "Well, it happened last night. There wasn't much I could do about it then and the food and drink had been paid for."
Kudos to him for sticking it out through the wedding and speeches. I understand the marriage was anulled.
~ Length? It's genetic.
(, Fri 15 Jul 2005, 0:01, Reply)
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