Things to do before you die
Sandettie Light Vessel Automatic tells us that his ambition is to a) drive around New Zealand in a camper van; and b) have MASSIVE sex with the original members of Bananarama. Tell us what's on your wish list, and why.
( , Thu 14 Oct 2010, 13:08)
Sandettie Light Vessel Automatic tells us that his ambition is to a) drive around New Zealand in a camper van; and b) have MASSIVE sex with the original members of Bananarama. Tell us what's on your wish list, and why.
( , Thu 14 Oct 2010, 13:08)
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Plenty of lube, I'm a first timer
Finally be able to look at the squiggly line burned into my peripheral vision by that twat with the laser pen.
Discover a method for shaking/squeezing/vacuuming out every single drop of urine thus preventing the inevitable plib of wee-wee from escaping the glans just after enpantment.
Actually say something when a gobbet of someone else's spit lands on your face mid-conversation (my boss is a MILF but has too much saliva in her mouth. Not sure if it turns me on).
Give Dappy from 'NnnnnnnDubz' a space-wedgie (bungie cord and a rocket).
Stuff a chicken without thinking about microwaving it to 37.5 degrees and sexing it up necro-poultry-style.
( , Wed 20 Oct 2010, 23:00, 12 replies)
Finally be able to look at the squiggly line burned into my peripheral vision by that twat with the laser pen.
Discover a method for shaking/squeezing/vacuuming out every single drop of urine thus preventing the inevitable plib of wee-wee from escaping the glans just after enpantment.
Actually say something when a gobbet of someone else's spit lands on your face mid-conversation (my boss is a MILF but has too much saliva in her mouth. Not sure if it turns me on).
Give Dappy from 'NnnnnnnDubz' a space-wedgie (bungie cord and a rocket).
Stuff a chicken without thinking about microwaving it to 37.5 degrees and sexing it up necro-poultry-style.
( , Wed 20 Oct 2010, 23:00, 12 replies)
No matter how hard you shake it, the last drops always come off in your underpants.
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 1:37, closed)
Remember the song
"no matter how you shake and dance, the last drop's always in your pants."
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:24, closed)
"no matter how you shake and dance, the last drop's always in your pants."
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:24, closed)
"No matter how your shake your peg, the last wee drop runs down your leg"
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:54, closed)
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:54, closed)
I developed a method for this
It's because while pissing certain muscles are still tensed, so I "pretend" to myself that I've put it away when really I haven't, the muscles relax and the last few drops come out
Then I put it away
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:31, closed)
It's because while pissing certain muscles are still tensed, so I "pretend" to myself that I've put it away when really I haven't, the muscles relax and the last few drops come out
Then I put it away
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:31, closed)
Old man's trick...
Just as you're about to finish, lean forward very slightly and a gentle push upwards on the peroneum/taint (whatever you call it) should do it! Please report your findings.
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:35, closed)
Just as you're about to finish, lean forward very slightly and a gentle push upwards on the peroneum/taint (whatever you call it) should do it! Please report your findings.
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:35, closed)
Do you mean your 'notcher'?
'cos it's notcher arse and it's notcher bollocks?
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 10:01, closed)
'cos it's notcher arse and it's notcher bollocks?
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 10:01, closed)
because this wouldn't look odd at all at a public urinal. not at all.
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 10:07, closed)
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 10:07, closed)
"Enpantment" is a great word
Can't think how I survived without it...
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:36, closed)
Can't think how I survived without it...
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 9:36, closed)
before talking to the boss
Get her to kneel down first, or alternatively climb onto a chair
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 10:14, closed)
Get her to kneel down first, or alternatively climb onto a chair
( , Thu 21 Oct 2010, 10:14, closed)
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